The Ruined Rainbow

CHAPTER 31

I love you. You are my only reason to stay alive if that’s what I am.

                    -Twilight: New Moon (2009)

Ayesha

Sahil told me about the places we could visit and plans we could have. We could go for a quick brunch or even go to Bandra for shopping. I know that this was an attempt to make me feel better, but I was not able to follow him.

I placed my coffee down and stared into it; the steams coming above and disappearing in the thin air. I feel like my thoughts are getting jammed, as I don't know what I want to do.

I was leaving today. I was leaving Mumbai today. Mumbai... The land that has given me so much and yet taken away so much. Mumbai had given me a terrible childhood; it had granted me a family where no one spoke to each other, it had given me my father's death, it had given me my uncle as my stepfather, the man who caused all pain in my life. It had given me my family's death, and injuries. It had given me the worst life possible.

But instead, Mumbai had also given me Sahil. Sahil... He was the solution for all my problems; he was the one who did not make me regret of being in Mumbai, he was the one who trusted me, supported me and wanted me to be happy. He did not run away from me as everyone would, but came forward to help me in my tough times. He was the sole reason I was alive still. He was the reason; I stayed in Mumbai or else, I don't know what I would have done to myself.

I was leaving today. So, the time had come at last. What should I do? Honestly, I didn't know.

Ayesha, promise me you will file the FIR again. You will put your uncle behind bars. That bastard deserves it.

Promise?

Is that a yes?

I think the time has finally arrived and I must confront my uncle before he escapes with a bail. I must do that now at any cost.

Funny how confusing it can be. One moment I want to rip my uncle into pieces for making life horrible to me and here I am debating if I must confess to everyone at last. I know I should, but suddenly I am not finding the courage to do that.

Promise? Is that a yes?

I guess.

"Sahil, " I interrupted his talks, "I want to go to the Police Station.", the last part coming barely as a whisper. I did not look up and looked fixedly at my coffee,  which had gone cold in my hands.

" The Police Station?" Sahil asked quietly, "why?"

I feel tears fast filling in my eyes, but I also feel a strange sort of anger. I closed my eyes to make sure I wouldn't cry in front of him, not that I care, but I just can't make him feel bad for me.  But right now I know I can't lie or not say anything to Sahil. I had not lied but delayed the truth to a great extent of time.

"Ayesha, " he said his voice still quiet, "please tell me. Please, ?"

I look at Sahil's eyes, and I know, I can't delay it any longer. His eyes searched for mine, and his voice wasn't demanding or annoyed but pleading and begging me to tell what had happened to me that had made me hate my life so much? What had happened to my life, that I waited for years to change? After all the things he had done to me, I owed him an explanation. I had promised to tell him, but I guess the time has finally arrived. My head was hurting. That traumatic chapter flashed across my eyes. I had avoided the truth for so long, but now I had to face the facts.