[editing]
❝ I fucked you good then. Didn't I? ❞
Love is a funny word with so many interpretations of its definition. Famous professional writer Park Jimin believed love to be a warm feeling felt within his heart if he was in the arms of someone he t...
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✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･
"Am I your sex toy, Jungkook? Is it because I let you fuck me most of the time we were alone?" Jimin chewed the last piece of the fourth pancake his boyfriend cooked for him.
The actor stopped moving his hands, he was about to wash the pan but his movements froze. He didn't have to answer like he did before because of Min Woo, but right at that moment he was traumatized. His walls for Park Jimin were breaking apart because he wanted comfort, something he should deserve (all human beings should) and at his weakest moment, the words rolled off his tongue. However, it wasn't the answer to Jimin's question, instead he opened the lock of his heart. And he won't blame it on how he was not mentally stable at the moment.
Jungkook began, "When I was eleven, he raped my mom in front of me. . ." He let the pan drop on the sink and let his back face the writer's surprised expression. "Ever since then, my life became a fucked up memory." He pressed his hands against the sink for support and exhaled a breath for his next choice of words. "Jimin hyung, I watched him tear my mother apart, yet I couldn't do anything to save her. That was the first time I heard her voice go above a whisper and all she could do was apologize." He still couldn't face his boyfriend. The shame was attacking him and the guilt was breaking a huge crack in his inner walls.
Jimin gulped the last chewed piece of pancake inside his mouth and paid attention to the unexpected revelation from his boyfriend. His anger from the hours prior was still there yet he was there for Jungkook. He stood up and approached the male. He circled his arms around his thin waist and leaned his chin on the muscle of the actor's left shoulder.
Jungkook continued, "My mother was deaf by birth. I don't remember what exactly was the cause, but I think she once mentioned something about her genetics. She barely talked and then... he forced her voice out in front of me." He looked inside of himself and felt the strong urge to break down but he won't. At least he didn't want to cry in front of Jimin, but with closed eyes some slipped.
"After that, he took us to a basement and that's where I last saw and felt her in my arms before..." Jungkook paused and felt himself low on air. The same dark dilated eyes haunted his mind in a black cloud, letting thunder rumble all over his thoughts. "—I woke up naked in another room chained against a bed with him waiting."
Jimin choked a sob, breathing hitched. He was not expecting the actor to confess such a memory and it pained him how he had suffered more than he could've imagined.
"He made me into what I am. I'm a fucked up man that doesn't deserve you." Jungkook stared at the locked hands holding his waist and Jimin's eyes blinked tears when he heard the next words out of his boyfriend's lips. "He taught me 'love and fucking are the same'. That's why I don't know what love is, Jimin-ssi. I do know you're not a sex toy and I-I... I've hurt you in ways that you don't know." The arms on his body tightened on grip when the younger's chest began panting and his body almost had another panic attack. It was at this moment that pandora's box was unleased.
