Hard to love (J.JK)

Chapter 36

- Y/N's POV-

''No. I'm not gonna have a serious conversation like this. I'm....'' I sighed before slightly tilting my head as I nervously intertwined my fingers behind his neck.

''I'm not gonna walk away....promise'' I spoke seeing him smile.

''Okay then...I trust you''

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Both of us were settled on the couch after freshening up. I nervously sat on my spot covering myself with a blanket while my knees were pressed up against my chest. How am I supposed to explain to Jungkook my feelings when I'm not sure of them myself?

''So why are you not with Minseok? You don't like him like that right?'' Jungkook spoke the moment he plopped down in front of me.

''Uhmm....I like Minseok but not like that..'' I admitted seeing him nod.

''Then give me a chance'' He stated once again that question making my face lose color.

''I thought we agreed on just getting a divorce'' I spoke reminding him about the short conversation we had in the car.

''That was before I knew you are not planning to be with Minseok. The only reason why I agreed was because I didn't want our marriage to stand between you and the person you love. I told you....if Minseok wasn't in the picture I would be more stubborn of letting you go.'' Jungkook explained but it still didn't make sense to me.

''Why? You said so yourself you liked me. Past tense'' I spoke repeating his words.

''Liked is past tense....love is present'' He replied rubbing the back of his nape.

''What..?''

''Liking someone and loving someone are two different things. I liked you that was only till I realized that I actually love you....But I know that you don't feel the same way'' Jungkook spoke making me shake my head in confusion still trying to take this all in.

''I don't know what I feel....''' I muttered looking down at my knees.

''So give me a chance. We are not making a deal just give me a chance to change your feelings about me. We said so ourselves there is still so much we don't know about each other. I'll show you.....what kind of person I am..what kind of person I can be. And if by the end of it your feelings towards me still haven't changed...I'll get a divorce without any complaints.'' I sighed leaning my head into my hands. Silence fell as Jungkook waited for me to reply. I stood up from my spot getting rid of the blanket covering me.

''You know I think I should just get away for some time to figure this out by myself. With this whole rumor thing going on I'm sure my boss doesn't want me at the office till it's settled down so it's a great timing for me to just go on a trip somewhere alone'' Walking my way towards the bedroom I felt Jungkook his harsh grip on my wrist stopping me.

''See....You're walking away'' He spoke softly and realizing my actions I felt ashamed. I broke a promise that easily.

''I'm sorry...I just need time to figure this out'' I spoke softly turning around to meet his eyes.

''We can figure this out together'' He insisted making me shake my head. His hand was still holding onto my wrist slightly pulling me towards him.

''You know...I just think you're scared. That you do feel the same away about me but you just don't want too. I know what I did to you in the past is unforgivable bu-''

''The past is in the past. It's not that...I know that you aren't like that anymore.....'' I interrupted. Feeling Jungkook his head leaning against mine as he stepped closer made my hands sweat and it seemed as the sound of my beating heart could be heard by him.