Becoming His Obsession h.s.

28

They say atoms are made of the remnants of broken stars. Maybe that's why I see galaxies in your eyes, and why I can form constellations on your cheeks. Maybe that's why holding your hand alone seems to hold all the planets together. - c.r.

Shoutout to:

i_think_i_like_him

laurennic

ShawtygirlEFP

hannaanderssson

chrissyk6

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Harry Styles POV
✦✧✦✧✦✧8.02k reads ✧✦✧✦✧

UNEDITED

"Good job, you're starting to figure me out." Lilly replied, locking eye contact with me.

I wanted her so bad. Her cheeks flushed a deep scarlet, small strands of her chestnut hair were whisked across her creamy white face. Her blue-gray eyes were watery with tears and they shone like a thousand diamonds. Her pale rose lips looked so full and sweet, like a strawberry candy.

I leaned in close, wrapping my arms around her small waist and firmly pressing my lips to hers. She didn't move a single muscle, just stood there, stiff in my grasp. She shoved me off, her chest rising and falling at a quick pace. I stumbled over my feet and looked down at her. She pulled her fist back and-

I felt a painful blow to the side of my jaw, causing my head to whip to the side. I slowly turned to face Lilly and I felt anger spread my across my features like wildfire. She didn't cower away when I roughly grabbed her arm and stared deeply into her beryl eyes. Small shadows of darkness flittered to every corner of her iris. I restrained from digging my fingernails into her flesh.

"I'll go warm up the car," I half whispered, watching the shadows in her eyes disappear. "I'm sorry." I felt tears brim my eyes. The tears began to sting, kind of like how hand sanitizer stings an open cut on your hand you had no idea about. She let out a minuscule gasp, and ran up to the apartment. I hated these mixed emotions, it was horrible.

I slowly followed behind her, gripping onto the railing to support my weak body. I didn't want her to leave. I wanted to keep her here with me. I needed to keep her here with me. I whimpered when I opened the front door only to see Lilly crouched by the fireplace. She looked up at me with hopeful eyes and a fake smile.

"What made you change your mind, Harry?" That made my heart ache. I don't know why, but when she said my name in that sad tone, it made my heart crack.

"Change your tone," I avoided her question. She raised an eyebrow in confusion. I shook my head and proceeded to talk, "I don't know what happened. Something invisible snapped inside me, I just need you to go, get as far away from me as possible." I mumbled, digging my keys out of my pocket.

I flung open the door and stood in the doorway, the mist of the cold air refreshing my agitated nerves. "Come on, before I change my mind." She jumped to her feet and rushed over to me. She was antsy and her eyes held a million secrets that were probably to be tossing back and forth in her mind. "I need to ask you something, first, and I need a quick answer."

She pouted out her bottom lip and crossed her thin arms across her well developed chest. "Fine, but only one qu-"

"Do you hate me?"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me," I growled. "Do you hate me?" She twisted her charm necklace between her fingers, and avoided eye contact with me. She mumbled something that I didn't catch. "What was that, love?" I taunted, feeling a large wave of emptiness grow in the pit of my stomach.

She breathed out and looked up at me. Her anger was as clear as her crystal eyes. "No, Harry, I don't hate you. Now please take me home, I already know this conversation isn't going to end well."

Without a word, I went down to the parking lot with Lilly following behind me. I unlocked my car and slid in the squeaky leather seat. She reluctantly got in and stared down at her shoes. It wasn't the best time for talking and I hated the silence. It spoke too loud and gave me throbbing headaches that no medication could cure. I clicked on BBC radio and listened to the low music humming in the background.

I pulled up in front of her house and felt my heart ache when she opened the door without a single glance at me. Before she left the car, I grabbed her arm. "I don't get a goodbye, baby? Not even a kiss on the cheek, nothing? You're just going to leave me so soon?"

"Goodbye Harry." she stiffened up and stared down at my hand. I cleared my throat and gently let go of her, watching her get out of the car and run up to the house. My heart was thumping against my chest and my eyes started to burn again. I choked on my own tears as they came out in never ending droplets.

I didn't want to let her go, I wanted her to myself. I wanted to hold her tight against my chest and bury my face into the crook of her neck. I wanted to kiss the warm skin of her neck and take in her vanilla scent. I wanted to lay beside her and lightly run my fingers down her back whilst whispering sweet nothings in her ear. I wanted to wake up in the morning with my face pressed against her shoulder and my arm securely wrapped around her midsection just to keep her next to me.

Why can't I have any of that? Why can't I be normal for once? Is there something wrong with me?

My brain turned against me. My subconscious switched its attitude.

That's because your crazy. You're a psycho bastard, Lilly will never love you. Lilly doesn't want to be around you. You scare her! SHE DOESN'T BELONG TO YOU.

"Shut up! She does belong to me! She's mine!" I screamed at myself in my empty car. "Don't tell me that she isn't mine! I know what I fucking own and I own HER." I whispered in a hoarse voice.

I frowned and felt lump of guilt growing in my throat that I couldn't swallow down. Do I act this way all the time? My subconscious is right.

I've been a horrible person to Lilly and I'm just realizing this now? How come I haven't opened up my eyes to this before? I had so many emotions going through my I just wanted them to go away. "Go away," I whimpered, grabbing a fistful of my curls and yanking on them. "Get out of my head. I know I'm submissive, just, stop! I realize my errors, now get out of my thoughts!" I screamed.

The old tears were replaced with new ones that refreshed my flustered cheeks. I drove away from Lilly's house, I couldn't have a mental breakdown in front of there. I didn't want to go home alone, I needed someone to comfort me. I didn't like being alone that's why I need Lilly.

I haven't visited the pub in a while. Maybe I deserve a little break from her. I need to get my mind off of her. I took a sharp turn and sped off in a the opposite direction.

I didn't stop driving until I found nice parking space in front of the pub. When I got out of the car, all I could hear was thumping music, the laughter of drunk people, and my shoes crunching over the dirt.

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧