sat by the ocean

not mine

I can be overprotective,
especially on the emotional front
and maybe I am a little crazy
but I think that's alright

I am protective of all those I hold near
but now that I've cut you off,
it's getting hard to bear
the need to protect.

not mine,
I tell myself,
you're not mine anymore.

I desperately wanted you to leave me,
and now that I've left,
I'm happier.

but I still fee the need to protect.

there are so many people in this world that don't know what they're doing
and I have found the key to many good things
they won't have to go it alone so long as I'm there

and yet
it becomes too much
and I fall behind

I can be overprotective,
especially on the emotional front
and maybe I am a little much
but I think it's endearing

no matter what I do,
no matter who or how I change,
no matter how much I go through,
I still feel the need to protect.

maybe it's the wolf in me.
always ready to lay down his life to protect those he loves.

or maybe the part of me that's still trapped in the past.
always on the defensive, never stopping until the job is done, even when she's in pain.

or maybe it's just how I am.
maybe I just want to keep all those I love safe.

I have never really had much reason to explore that part of myself until now.
maybe it's time.
after all, I love to know these things.
even if others day it's pointless.

I disagree anyway.