close encounters

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sat by the ocean,
I rise and I stare
I have had a close encounter of violence
and I did not like the bloody taste in my mouth it left me after.

sat on this couch here,
fingers poised to type
in the past, I've had close encounters with fingers
they ran up my spine and left me worried

sat by this ocean,
I stand up and I weep
I am so terribly tired
and here offers me nothing

if this ocean was real,
perhaps I'd let it take me away
see what adventures would come if it
and maybe never return to the day

in the darkness,
I see shadows
turn the heat up
so I can sweat it out

I am tired
and I have been lied to
and I have been bruised
and I have not yet been kissed

I belong to myself
I am my own responsibility
I care for this body of mine

but just once,
I wanna make the bad decision,
and belong to somebody else for a day.

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