Nothing Else Matters - Perrie Edwards

Chapter Four

I was sat cleaning in between the nozzles on my mixing desk with headphones around my neck blasting Little Mix's music when Maddie knocked on my door and walked right in. She sat on my bed and crossed her legs.

I sarcastically looked to my door and called "Who's there? Oh hello Maddie, yes come right in, please!"

"Shut up Jakob." Maddie sighed.

I switched the music off and sat facing her on the bed.

"Do you ever stop listening to those women?"

"No." I smiled. "You should stop having a go and actually listen to them properly one day."

"I'm not here to talk about Little Mix Jake."

"I know."

"I want to know about mum."

"Why?" I asked. "Why all of a sudden are so interested in her?"

"I dunno! I've been thinking about her for ages now, more than ever... I just want to know why she left, is that so awful."

"No... I don't even know myself, I-"

"But you think you do." Maddie pushed. "I just want to know something, I'm sick of knowing nothing."

I started biting my nails. Maddie did the same. "I was only five..." I said slowly. "But I remember them arguing all the time about money."

Maddie leaned forwards slightly, resting her chin in the palm of her hand.

"I just remember dad was working all the hours under the sun, I think at one point he had three jobs... Obviously she was here looking after us lot... But he'd come home and they'd just fight all the time."

"How d'you remember if you were only five?"

"Yeah... But it's not something you forget too easily."

Maddie shuffled forward on the bed a tiny bit. "What about when she left?"

I nodded. "I watched her go."

Maddie just waited.

"I remember their arguing waking me up... I heard them outside and went to the window and she was walking off with her bags. Dad was devastated, he kept shouting that he'd try harder and he'd get another job. He said he'd do anything. But she still went."

"You really remember that?"

"Like I said, it's hard to forget." I shrugged. "You weren't even one then." I added softly.

"And... What? She never came back? Not even once?"

"That was the last I saw of her."

Maddie was silent for a minute, and then she said. "Where d'you think she is now?"

I swung my legs off the bed and went back and sat at my mixing desk. "I don't know Maddie, and I don't care. Dad raised us. Maybe you should concentrate on treating him with a bit more respect. You know, appreciate the parent that stuck by us rather than waste time on thinking about the one who walked out on us."

I expected Maddie to kick off then. I kind of wanted her to; I wasn't used to deep, intimate conversations with my sister and it had made me uncomfortable. She was the one I was used to arguing with, so this kind of conversation was a bit surreal. But she didn't make a sound. I heard my bed creak as she got off it and thought she was leaving. Then all of a sudden she wrapped her arms around my shoulders and gave me a tight hug. It was so unexpected and I jumped slightly.

"Thanks Jake." She muttered and she practically ran from the room.

Once I got over the shock, I lay on my bed and tried to get up the courage to actually send the message I had been writing, deleting and rewriting to Perrie since that afternoon.