Venompool - Marvel (MCU) X Male Reader

2.2 - Strange Happenings

Y/N woke up the next morning still in his clothes from the night and found himself still with his plastic bag full of coke and sweets "Fucking hell, how many times in this pissing book am I gonna find myself in an alley?" He groaned picking himself off of the floor.

He stretched out making clicking noises in his arms, back and neck whilst nursing a piercing headache "Ugghhh, What the fuck happened last night?" He questioned himself before being taken away from his thoughts by his stomach rumbling extremely loudly "Well I'm never gonna figure out with my stomach rumbling like this"

Y/N made his way back to his apartment complex and he was rustling around in his jean pockets for his keys.

"Rough night Y/N?" A female voice asked Y/N

He looked up to see his neighbour - an elderly Asian woman standing in her doorway.

"Morning, Mrs Chan you're looking as beautiful as always" Y/N said as cheerfully as he possibly could but in all honesty it was a real struggle.

"And you look like shit.......... Anyways your newspaper came to my apartment again" She said handing him the newspaper.

"Ahhh you always know how to brighten up morning don't you........but I'll let you get back to playing shuffleboard or eating prunes or whatever it is you old people do" Y/N joked with a blank expression as he took the newspaper from Mrs Chan's hands checking he date on the paper "April 21st 1988" he muttered to himself before finally unlocking the door and entering his apartment swiftly shutting the door behind him.

He could've sworn she called him an asshole but wasn't a hundred percent sure "It's times like these that I'm jealous of Logan's Superhuman senses but hey at least I don't have metal bonded to my skeleton."

Y/N got to his fully stocked fridge and had a sudden craving for all the goods in there. With more speed than he remembered having he quickly pulled out all the meat products that were there which included a full roast chicken and a couple of bacon rasher packs.

He tore through the roast bird with phenomenal pace, eating the whole thing within three minutes leaving a pile of small chicken bones on the dinner plate.

His hunger still not satisfied, he ripped open the packs of bacon and threw the meat into several frying pans. The sizzling and smell of the meat cooking was making his taste buds tremble, once it was sufficiently cooked he grabbed meat straight out of the pan that was still cooking on the gas cooker, the oil and juices burned his hands "Motherfucker, the sacrifice I make for food" Y/N yelled.

He stuffed his face with the bacon, his cheeks resembling that of a hamster and he could barely chew with all the meat in his mouth "Get your head out of the gutter, you sick fucks. I'm the only one who gets to make these types of jokes in this book" Y/N said with his voice muffled as he struggled to eat.

He did a cartoonish like swallow, with the whole load going down his throat at once "Seriously, you're fucking doing this on purpose now and it's really starting to piss me off!" Y/N yelled up to the ceiling.

After eating a whole roast chicken and several packs of bacon all within ten minutes, Y/N unsurprisingly felt needed to go to the toilet to ease the discomfort from his stomach. He ran to his bathroom and sat down to take a massive shit, he started moaning and yelling until he heard a plop noise in the bowl, he started laughing to himself "Ahhh you gotta love the ones that make you sweat".

He pulled up his jeans and underpants after wiping before washing his hands and face. After throwing some water into his face in an effort to wake him up a bit more, he looked at his reflection in the mirror above his sink "God, Mrs Chan was right I do look like shit" he let out a large sigh.