The Gay Project

3.9

~April~

Louis was sweaty, and he really hated being sweaty. Well, he didn't mind being sweaty in bed with Harry... but that wasn't the case here. Louis was finishing up practice for the spring musical. It was April 3rd and they had twenty days to get it all together.

"That was wonderful, Louis," Jade said, handing her friend a bottle of water, which Louis happily took and gulped down. He'd been busting his ass to make his last musical as perfect as could be.

"Thank you," Louis said softly. "But you.. wow. You're the perfect Dorothy. I'm so happy that you have the lead. Please, do not get randomly sick or fall down the stairs because then-"

"Roni is not taking my place," Jade assured Louis, rubbing his petite shoulder. "I promise, you won't have to deal with her, Louis. She's not getting any spot in this musical and she's definitely not getting any spot in your life anymore. You don't need to worry about her, okay? Just forget about it." Jade retied her ponytail as Mr. Glass ordered them to get ready for another run in five minutes. "Where's Harry?"

"Uh... I don't know," Louis said honestly. "We've both been extremely busy. In fact... well, we never really have time for much conversation these days. He swims and plays footie, plus he's trying to keep up his grades... And when we are together.. we jump each other's bones, because we miss each other, and then we sleep right after."

Jade laughed a little, nodding in agreement. "Wow, I'm a little jealous of your sex life," she breathed, shaking her head. "But I'm in the same boat where I'm so incredibly busy... so I cannot possibly have time for a boyfriend or.. whatever. All my uni applications are in and I'm just waiting on replies.. then, maybe I can find myself a lover."

Louis nodded in agreement, tossing his empty bottle. "Same here, about uni. I applied to the performing arts program in London and.. well, that's really all I want," he said with a small laugh.

"With Harry, of course," Jade said with a small smile.

"Yes, of course," Louis assured her. "I'm just... he hasn't really mentioned his uni applications. He mentioned football but nothing else. But he did say London... not sure. We will see-"

"Places," Glass called, and Louis gave Jade a fleeting smile before he was getting in his spot to run through the scene.

~~

"Harry, what are you doing home?" Anne asked when she saw her son come through the doors halfway through the school day. Anne herself had just finished a fourteen hour shift and she was surprised to see her son right before she was heading to sleep.

"I'm okay," Harry said, shrugging his shoulders. "I .. really, I just have a headache."

Anne frowned, moving over to her son and feeling his head. "You feel okay," she said softly. "Harry... you've been a little behind in school. Are you sure-"

"Can you mind your own business?" Harry breathed, before closing his eyes, trying to think back to what his therapist told him just the day before.

"So, do you think the absence of your mother has affected you in any way?" Dr. Freeman asked Harry, sipping her tea and focusing in on the young man.

"Oh.. well, absolutely," Harry said quietly. "I mean... why wouldn't it? My dad died when I was two, I had an abusive step father, and then my mum decided work was the only important thing in her life, after the ass got put in prison." He sighed, brushing his hand through his hair. "But... what does that have to do with Louis?"

"Well, it sounds like you just expect people to leave you, Harry. That's often a problem, that happens. Defense mechanisms can be built when you've had problems with your parents, and it goes into everything in your life, especially in your relationships. Platonic and romantic."

"So how do I fix it?"

"Start with forgiveness."

Harry let out his breath and he said, "My grades are actually fine. I know that you... haven't had time to check them out... but... I am doing great. I had a brief falling out just from fighting with Louis and not sleeping."

"Oh," Anne said slowly. "I didn't know you and Louis had been fighting."

"Because you're never home."

Forgiveness.

"I know," Anne said slowly. "I'm... I'm sorry, Harry. I know I'm busy but I -"

"It's okay," Harry said quietly, shrugging again. "I'm.. I want to catch a nap and then I have plans later, so.. I'll see you."

Anne wanted badly to hug her son but she just let him go.

~~

Louis was staring at the clock. It was eight in the evening. He'd gotten out of practice at six today, then headed to the footie field to surprise Harry, but he wasn't at practice, according to Liam, who had subbed in as captain. Louis had tried to contact the man but he was nowhere to be found. He wouldn't answer any calls or texts. And Louis was even more worried when he got home and Anne said she hadn't seen her son since noon.

Louis heard the door open and close and he bolted downstairs, relieved when he saw Harry.

"Hey," Louis breathed. "Uh.. didn't know where you were."

"Sorry... uh, late footie practice," Harry mumbled.

Louis stared at him, startled by the lie. "Uh... oh?" He asked slowly.

"Yeah, my bad," Harry mumbled.

"Hmm," Louis said quietly. "Seems like you've had a lot of long practices lately."

"Yeah, I have been. Sorry," Harry said with a raised eyebrow. "What's the matter? You've been busy, too."

Louis just shook his head. "Hm. Okay. Well, why don't we... can we go upstairs and just.. can we talk?" He asked gently. "Just spend time together."

"I'm actually really tired," Harry said, squeezing Louis's shoulder. "I'm going to make something to eat and then shower and get in bed. You're welcome to join me in the shower."

Of course, Louis thought. All Harry wanted lately was sex. He didn't want to have any conversation. "No," he says. "I want to talk, Harry. I want to have a night together. We haven't had any time and I'll be late at practice the next few days-"

"Louis, just.. let's go to lunch together tomorrow, just us," he said softly. "And we can talk."

"Okay," Louis said slowly. He had no idea where his boyfriend had been that night and it really worried him. Now he thought that, maybe, Harry was cheating on him...

When, in reality, Harry was just at therapy, but Harry just wasn't ready to tell Louis yet. He didn't know if it was even going to work out.

"I'm sorry, I ... look, let me eat and shower and we can watch a movie, okay?" He said softly, kissing Louis's forehead and heading off to the kitchen to make something to eat. He didn't want to hurt Louis's feelings, so he agreed to just spend time with Louis. It's not like Harry didn't want to. He did, of course, but he had been so exhausted from everything lately.

After dinner and a shower, Harry headed into the room, pulling on sweats. Louis was tucked into bed, already asleep, and Harry laughed quietly, climbing in to sleep with the boy. Except... he didn't really sleep, he just stared at the ceiling, thinking about his life, and everything in it. He was going through a rough patch and he wished that he was a better talker, that he could confide in Louis, but both boys seemed to be on their own paths in that time, and Harry felt alone.

~~

Here's a little chapter for you to enjoy!

Also, For those of you who read The Broke Deal, that's continuing as well! there's already a chapter up!

These future chapters may be a little rough coming up, I'll post a warning on the harder ones, but you're going to start seeing more of who Harry truly is, his inner thoughts, what happened with his abusive stepfather, and it may be tough for some.

Everyone have happy holidays, whatever you celebrate!

x Queen B