Bees & Honey [H.S]

Chapter 43

If you ever want to get over something- expose yourself to it. It's funny how I've always heard it as a method to get over a fear. In this case, it was someone- a person, and a feeling.

For the past two weeks I had been stuck working on the last details of 'Harry Styles at the BBC' before its broadcast, which was today. I had been the editor's right hand, and a middle hand between BBC and Harry's team- which clearly had no Harry in it. Jeff and I had been in close contact, sending clips of the parts that we wanted to publish to youtube. And then when it finally was done- the whole show. In Jeff's words, everything was more than approved. But by who? Him? Harry? Harry and him? I couldn't stop myself from asking these questions inside the mess that was my mind.

But the more contact I had with Jeff, I quit asking how much of what we were talking about went through Harry, if anything at all. By the lack of Harry getting mentioned in the conversation, I was starting to get a sense that it was indeed, nothing at all. However, Jeff seemed like his happy and structured self, which made me think that he had no clue what has gone down. Or maybe he just was really good at his job, that was protecting Harry and remaining professional in his role that was his manager in this case, and I a Radio Broadcast Assistant- meaning that there was no space for personal issues.

I can't lie, it was torture in the beginning. Working with content that was Harry and nothing else was unbearable in the beginning. Watching him everyday, talking about him at all times... The worst part was watching the clips from his performances, especially The Chain and Girl Crush, the reason already being obvious.

Weirdly enough, it then almost turned out to be like therapy for me. As I said, if you ever want to get over something- or someone, expose yourself to it so much so that you eventually, somewhat, change the cognition.

After getting an unusual sleep in, I was at the office. Since the show aired at 8PM, and all of the team that had worked on it was staying to watch, all of us had taken the morning off. Around 6 we were finally done with the actual work for the day and me and another colleague was returning from grabbing food for everyone around the corner. When we arrived back everyone was already popping champagne bottles in our lunch room and handing out glasses filled with bubbles.

"Sugar!" Grimmy shouted at me from the middle of the cheerful group he was surrounded with when he saw me walk in. I looked over my shoulder as I was still walking to place the food on the counter, but Grimmy ran up to me faster than I walked.

"Here you go." He tried handing me a glass.

"I kinda have my hands full." I chuckled back, gesturing to both bags I was carrying. He shrugged with what I thought was mischief in his eyes. And I was right. The drink was suddenly pushed in my face, forcing me to stop and take a sip. My first sip of alcohol since... Well, it had been a month and a half since that night and the time I last had a drink, and oh, how I had missed the taste of sweet bubbles.

"What are you doing?" I laughed as I backed away from him trying to make me chug the whole glass in one, clearly not pleased that I only stopped for one sip.

"Giving you a helping hand since yours was full." Grimmy winked, now very much amused with his own comment.

"Well thanks for the... help." I spoke sarcastically back while finally placing the bags next to my colleagues, who was already unpacking everything.

"Leave that." Grimmy interrupted me from my side. I was just going to object to his instruction, not wanting to leave all the work for the other person, but Grimmy again interrupted me.

"I need to show you something." He beamed excited, while slowly backing away to the door. Suspicious and surprised I watched him, still standing in my spot.