Through the dark

Part 11

You wake up from Haz yelling.
Y/n: What's going on? What are you so mad about?

Haz: Isn't it obvious? You're in bed with my best friend and I don't wanna know what else you did..

Y/n: Firstly nothing happened! I had a nightmare and Tom was there for me and calmed me down. And secondly why are you so mad? What if anything did happen? What would have been the problem with that huh?

Haz: The problem is is that Tom isn't good for you! You deserve someone who is there for you. Someone who can protect you! And who's here and not all over the world.

Tom: Well you don't have to worry about it! I don't like your sister in that way and she doesn't like me like that either!

You look down and fight your tears when Tom said that.

Y/n: *Now you know for sure that Tom doesn't like you back...*

Tom: Lets go downstairs I'm hungry!

Haz is still not entirely happy but agrees.

Haz: Yeah let's go eat..

Both of them go out but Tom turns around one more time.

Tom: Are you coming?

You look at the ground.

Y/n: Hm? No I'm not really hungry..

Tom: Are you ok?

Y/n: *Of course I'm not ok?!*

Y/n: Yeah I'm fine it's just the jetlag I guess.

Tom: Ok but if there is something you want to talk about I'm here. Ok?

Y/n: Yeah  I know. Thank you.

You fake smile and Tom leaves.
As soon as he closes the door you break down crying and run into your bathroom. You look in the mirror and cry even more.

Y/n: *No wonder he doesn't like me back! I mean look at me. Who could ever love me?*

You take a jumper that's laying in the bathroom and put it on. You don't want to see your body anymore.
You get interrupted by a knock on the door.

Toms POV
Tom and Haz are going in the kitchen.

Haz: I'm going to the store. We have nothing to eat!

He takes his car keys and goes out the door.

Tom: *We went grocery shopping two days ago. Where is Haz actually going? Anyway I better check on y/n. She looked so upset when I left.

Your POV
You're still standing there looking in the mirror crying.

Tom: y/n? It's me Tom can you open the door? Please? I know you're in there. I know you're crying..

Y/n: Leave me alone! Indent want to talk to you or anyone!

Tom: Y/n please..

Tears are streaming down your face.

Y/n: Don't act like you care about me..

You lean against the bathroom door and slide down to the ground. You have your head in your hands crying your eyes out.

Tom: why would you think that I don't care about you?

Toms POV
Tom: *Why would she think that? Doesn't she realize that I live her?*

It hurts Tom to see you like that. He just wants to hug you and tell her that everything is gonna be alright.

You're POV
You're still crying on the bathroom floor. You think about hurting yourself again. You try to fight the thoughts but it's like your hands don't listen anymore and do everything on their own. You take a razor and cut your arm. Blood is running down your wrist. You repeat to cut yourself two more times before you put the razor away. You sit on the bathroom floor across the door. You sit down and keep crying.

Toms POV
Tom: *I have to get in there!*

Tom: y/n? If you don't open the door I'll have to kick it open.

You don't hear Tom you're lost in your thoughts. You don't even hear how Tom kicks the door open. You only feel his strong arms wrapping around you. You don't say anything and let him hug you. After what seems like forever he lets go of you. Tom looks at your arm and gets tears in his eyes. You cover your arm but it's to late.

Tom: W-what happened?

You want to tell him. You want to talk about everything but you can't.

Tom: Did-did I do something?

You say nothing and look down.

Tom: Does that mean I did?

You still don't say anything.

Tom: What did I do? Haz was right I'm not good enough for you!