I need you, I need you, I need you

chapter 73- everlasting love

January 17th, 2020
Rachel's p/v
I rest my chin on my hand. Brain is shutting down. Someone tell me why school at 8 am was invented.
"You need to eat soon or you're going to be late." Darry says. He takes a sip of his coffee.
"I'm not hungry. Let me leave the table."
"Oh, you're eating. I didn't even serve you that many eggs."
"I don't like eggs."
"Lies. Tell me the real reason why you don't want to eat."
"Why? So you can tell Mary?"
"I don't know why you're saying that."
"I'm not hungry." I shove the plate away from me and stand up. Should have done that sooner.

Darry's p/v
Rachel has been giving me so much sass and I don't know what to do. Like do I ground her? If I ground her she'll get even more angry. But if I just let her be then that'll give her the freedom to walk all over me. Seriously doubting my life choices right now. Why did she leave us? Why didn't she take us with her.

Rachel's p/v
My eye bags have eye bags so sunglasses are the way to go again. All night I was trying to find a reasonable explanation to my sleep walking. Tyler said it's normal, but I literally walked out of the house and went to some random place and took pics on my computer. The logistics? Not there. Am I freaked out? Yes. I don't want to think about that night anymore.

Easy outfit for today. I'm wearing my oversized black hoodie with grey sleeves, black ripped jeans with fishnets under them from Sabrina's bag, and my docs. I also have extensions in. I think I look pretty cool.

Mary's p/v
Seriously considering ditching school today. My mother is in bed with a hangover so that's the only thing keeping me from staying home. I just can't pull myself to go to my classes. The only thing racing through my mind is last night, or should I say morning. One thing I am sure on is that I'm not telling this to anyone. Maybe Darry, but only because I know he's dealt with drunk people before. His father, and himself. How do I help my mother? How do I better myself to help her.

My mind seriously feels like jello. I was actually going to go out in this outfit? Black turtleneck, blue denim jacket, purple corduroy pants, and my black docs. The shoes can stay, but the rest of the outfit? I need a cigarette.

Rachel's p/v
"Rachel, what do you think of my eraser? Smell it." My friend Leslie shoves her eraser in my face.
"It smells like chocolate."
"My dad bought me it in the 5th grade."
"Just as a gift?" Declan asks.
"Yup. You're just jealous, Declan."
"I am? I didn't know that."
"Mhm, you're so jealous."
"Rachel, did you do the math homework? I plain vanilla forgot about it."

Mary walks to her seat, her eyes on the floor, arms crossed. What the hell happened to her? Her outfit is SO cute but she looks tired and depressed. Her hair is also in a really messy low bun. She's wearing a white tight fitted dress with red polka dots all over and a scoop neckline with lace, red cardigan with the middle button buttoned, black docs, red socks, and a black fuzzy bag. Cute outfit, but she just looks so out of it.

"Rachel?"
I snap out of my thought. "Huh what?"
"Did you do the homework?"
"No, I didn't. Why?"
Declan looks at Leslie. "We're screwed."
"I'm just ready for the curve after the test."
"Me too. I'm so done for."

Mary's p/v
"Mary! Mary, wake up."
I lift my head up. "Huh? What happened?"
Jenna smiles. "Nothing. I got switched to this math class and the first thing that catches my eye is you sleeping. Don't want you to get in trouble with the teacher."
"I rather get in trouble. I seriously need some sleep."
"Take a nap after school. It's math time."
"Wish it wasn't. My brain is fried."
"It's been that type of morning. I missed my daily FaceTime with Kiker this morning. He said it's alright but I could tell he's upset."
"It would be stupid if he is."
"He doesn't really get angry about that type of stuff, especially since he's the one who always leaves my texts on read and rarely answers my calls. But lately he's been more attached than ever."
"It makes sense, you're not in California with him."
"I guess so. The extra attention is nice, but I just want everything back to normal."
"Like you said, it's been that type of morning. Let's just go through this day like we've always had."
"Zoning out with my camera, the absolute dream."
"I'll zone out with my phone camera. Not much of a professional camera user."'
"I checked out your insta, you have a sick style."
"Thank you. I haven't checked out yours."
"No worries. My work will always be there...except I deleted a couple of pictures. I want to start fresh, keep the good memories."
"I get it. I delete photos too."
"Bummer that I didn't get to see them. But now we can take photos together."
"The adventures of Mary and Jenna."
"We'd make the sickest portfolio."
I smile. "Yes, we would."