I need you, I need you, I need you

chapter 75- nectar of your voice

January 19th, 2020
Rachel's p/v
"Say goodnight to me. Or better yet, fall asleep on call with me."
I yawn. "You're so clingy."
Tyler smiles. "Fine, I won't send you my mirror selfie."
I throw my pillow at my computer screen. "Send me that damn photo!"
"Only if you say goodnight to me. Don't you dare hang up on me like you did an hour ago."
"Goodnight clingy mf."
"Goodnight love. Sleep with the angels."
"So you?"
Tyler blushes. "Goodnight."
I hang up the video call. Tonight is AWESOME.

Mary's p/v
"I told you I was coming over," Jonathan steps inside and takes off his coat, "are you going to offer me some coffee or."
"I didn't think you were actually being serious."
"I care about you, Mary. You're always on my mind."
"I appreciate it but my mother will be home any second now so if she catches you I'm dead meat."
"It's 12 am, you seriously think she's coming home soon?"
I don't answer. Having the house to myself is relieving, but I feel so lonely.
I sigh. "I still don't know why you're here."
"To prevent you from doing stupid shit," Jonathan picks up my scissors from the floor, "these yours?"
"No, they're Al Pacino's."
"Aw shoot, really? Shoulda told me, definitely would've worn my fancy jacket."
"Should've worn the fuzzy coat I thrifted you."
"You think that's fancy enough for Al Pacino? Please, your pjs wouldn't even impress him."
"I'm wearing a baseball tee from the 90s!"
"Are your white shorts with cherries from the 90s too?"
"From Urban, but he would want a pair too."
"He's old, not blind."
I giggle. Jonathan always knows how to make me feel better.
"Now that I lifted your spirit just a bit, wanna tell me why you were running around with scissors?"
I make a heart with my index and middle finger. "No."
"I kinda think you should."

I turn around, take a deep breath, and walk towards the couch.
"New location unlocked." He whispers.
"What's happening to me isn't new, but it feels different."
"Because you have a boyfriend you deeply like?"
"No! I liked you, Jonathan-"
"But not how you like Darry." He sits next to me.
"You're so wrong. In middle school those comments hurt me, but I genuinely believed that once I entered high school everything would change. I thought popular girls would want to be friends with me, guys would be all over me, people would actually know my name! "
"Everyone referred to you as that weird photography geek. You literally owned it."
"Max from Life Is Strange had nothing on middle school me. But everything is different now."
"You feel like you're failing your younger self."
"How did you-"
"I know you, Mary. Plus, we've all been through that mindset. I'm going to ask you a series of questions, alright?"
"Shoot."
"How many new friends have you made?"
"A lot, but I also lost a lot."
"You lost toxic ones that didn't deserve you. Now for the next question: how many guys went after you?"
"Only 3."
"What about that guy from New York?"
"4."
"Name all of them and from each time period."
"Shane from freshmen year. I told you about him."
"Now was he a douche?"
"No, he was really nice. I just wasn't ready for a relationship."
"Next."
"Tyler from last year."
"He left for you someone that is a weirdo who lives a pathetic life. His loss. Next?"
"That New York guy."
"You didn't date him because..."
"Because I liked Darry."
"But New York guy asked you out!"
"But I liked Darry!"
"And who are you dating?"
"Darry." I mumble under my breath.
"Who?"
"Darry! I don't see the point in this."
"You said no guys went after you. You were wrong."
"Sure, but people don't even know who I am."
"Because you have bad social skills. You need to start being yourself because Mary, you're incredible."
I smile. "You think so?"
"It doesn't matter if I think that, what matters is what you think about yourself. But yes, I think so."
"You're such a pal, Jonaboob."
"So are you, margarita."
"Isn't your mom concerned that you're not home?"
"I dunno, I snuck out."
I jump up. "You what?"
"It's ok! It was for a good cause."
"You need to leave before they karate chop your dick off."
"That's worse than my phone being taken away! Ok ok, I'll go. But let me do this one thing."
"What?"
Jonathan kisses me on the cheek. "Best friend kiss."
"I'm telling Darry and he will smash your head."
"Worth it. Do you like my profile picture on Insta?"
"Love it! You can't see my face, perfect."
"Bummer. Ok, but I really have to go now."
"Yeah, no kidding!"
"See ya tomorrow."
"Good night."
Jonathan grabs my scissors from the coffee table. "Just gonna take those."
"Give them back!"
Jonathan waves goodbye and walks out. Not even going to bother chasing after him. It's raining hard core.