I need you, I need you, I need you

chapter 57- the jukebox

December 21st, 2019
Rachel's p/v
"Are you kidding me? She was literally at the top of her game."
"I know right! It's like her teammates were jealous or sum."
"Oh yeah, definitely jealous."
"Oh yeah."
"Oh yeah."
I yawn. "We should probably head to sleep."
"I agree," Declan looks off to the distance, "It's 6:12 am."
I choke on my saliva. "6:12?"
"Says it right on the clock."
"We talked for 7 hours."
"I can go for another 2 hours."
"No no no no, I have to go back to my room before-"
"What the hell are you doing here?"
I look up at Tyler. Crap. "I can-"
"Explain? What is there to explain? It's quite obvious what's going on here."
"No no you got it all wrong! I promise you that all we did was talk."
"It doesn't look like that's all you guys did. Why are you so nervous?"
"Because this looks really bad?"
"Then tell me what you guys did."
"All we did was talk."
"Ok" Tyler says. He picks up a sweater from the floor.
"Tyler, all we did was talk."
"I believe you." He half smiles. He turns around and walks out the door. 
"Declan-"
"Don't worry, I'll talk to him. But just to be clear, I don't regret our conversation at all."
"I don't either but I think we should be quiet before-," I look into Declan's terrified eyes, "he's right next to me isn't he."
"Wow, took you long enough."
I close my eyes. "Darry, all we did was-"
"Talk? For how many hours?"
"7 hours." I answer.
"7?!" He yells.
"Shhh! Some people need their beauty sleep." Bowie says in a morning voice.
"And you guys think that talking for 7 hours in the night is ok?"
"Well I mean technically it wasn't the night-"
"Did I ask for your opinion, Declan?"
"No sir."
"Go back to your room, Rachel."
"Yes sir." I say as I zoom out the room.

Tyler's p/v
Water can't even pass down my throat. My hand wants to make a fist but I know that won't solve anything. I genuinely do believe Rachel, I'm just angry at the fact that she doesn't respect my feelings. I know she would get jealous if it was the other way around, and she has every right to, I did do it with Mary after all. But not in the middle of the night? And for hours on end? Rachel is my girl, and this karma is so painful.

I know she would never replace me with Declan, but doesn't everyone have those small feelings that just poke at you? I want her to know that she has me to come to for help. I want her to know that I'm trying my best to combat these very tiny insecurities. I want to convince myself that I'm good enough for her, but waking up to her and Declan smiling at each other at the bay window is so out of context and damaging. I don't need this spiraling in my mind.

Declan is running down the hall. Why did I think no one was going to find me in the cafe?
"Tyler! I've been looking everywhere for you man. It's like you're trying to hide from me."
"It's like that was sorta the plan."
"I'm sorry about all of this. Rachel and I talked about the hardships in life and then we gossiped about people from school. That is all we did."
"Dude, you don't have to explain yourself. I'm not mad at all."
"Then why did you leave?"
"Rachel knows why, I don't need to share with you."
"I respect that. So are we cool?"
I smile. "Yeah, we're cool."
"Awesome. Do you want to go back up together or are you still chilling with your water cup."
"I'll go back to the room with you to show that I have no hard feelings."
"Cool. Let's go then, Herrington."

Rachel's p/v
I seriously screwed that one up. Hopefully Declan calmed him down. Tyler is very...how do I put it...confusing. He doesn't like to show how he's truly feeling. Yeah he's affectionate and romantic, but he bottles up his feelings. I know he thought I was opening up to Declan because I had no one else do it to. I know him very well.

"You look breathtaking."
I turn around.  "He's spoken."
Tyler places a hand on my hip. "I'm sorry if I overreacted. I'm usually not like that."
"Angel, I need you to be honest with me. If you feel uncomfortable with something I do please let me know. It's not even your place to apologize, its mine."
"Maybe if you give me a hug I'll feel better."
I wrap my arms around him. "I am very much into you."
"Wow, I didn't know that. Can I tell you a secret too?"
"Proceed."
Tyler kisses me on the lips. "I like you."
"If you like me so much then help me pick out an outfit before Darry gets out of the shower."
Tyler heads straight to my suitcase. Yup, very much into this booger.