Commander, Soldier, Spy (Erwin X Reader)

Chapter 39- Electric Love

Erwin had been doing a lot of thinking about y/n since the night they slept side by side. Despite his hurt he still longed to go back to how things were. To feel the rush of adrenaline in his veins when their skin touched. To waltz through the fields of wildflowers arm in arm carefree, but completely and utterly alive. He sighed checking the clock and looking over towards y/n who sat reading in an armchair. It was almost time for his meeting. A meeting that could change his and the rest of the scouts lives forever.

"Erwin?" Y/n asked. He hadn't realised that he had zoned out and had been staring over at her for an uncomfortable amount of time.

"Sorry, I was lost in thought. Maybe we should go and get some fresh air. A walk always helps bring back my focus."

"You've hardly touched your paperwork ..." Y/n sighed her eyes saddening. " Are you sure everything's okay?"

"Yes, yes perfectly fine." Erwin picked up his pen determined to show y/n that he was alright. His left hand shook as he picked up the pen. As it grew closer to the paper it began to tremble more scratching across the parchment making tiny shaky marks on the line were his signature was supposed to go.

Y/n watched from across the room. He was clearly struggling. Standing from her seat she lay her book down on the table and walked over. Erwin stared intensely at his hand willing it to write clearly and concisely but he couldn't will it to do so. He furrowed his brow in frustration narrowing his eyes at the paper.

Y/n's hand found its way onto his steadying it. His shaking appeared to subside whether she held it steady or he had managed to get his body to bend to his own will he wasn't sure. But he did know that she still sent shocks through him. Electricity bubbled in his veins his neurons practically vibrating.

Erwin turned his head to look at y/n who was looking down at the paper. She guided his hand to the line and gently pushed his hand towards it. Still looking at y/n's side profile he smiled. Her concentration face was showing and he couldn't help but study it.

"I can't help you if you don't even try..." She groaned. Having moved his hand around to scratch out the e and r of his name in a scrawl that could only be described as that of a small child holding a pen for the first time.

"Sorry, like I said. I'm having trouble focusing. I'll try harder." Erwin relaxed his hand moving it to attempt to finish writing his name.

W... Still a little wobbly.

I... Better, but then it was only a single line.

N.... Almost as bad as the w.

He took a deep breath.

"We've got this " y/n reassured him

S... The smoothest he'd seen it in a while.

M... Much easier than W and N

I.... The first one definately wasn't a fluke.

T.... Just like I but with a little more flair.

H.... He'd done it. No. They'd done it.

He knew it wasn't perfect. But it was progress. He still doubted that he wouldn't be able to do it alone. Just like many things in his life it seemed. Just as she had before she had helped even when she didn't have to. He was reminded of the many times she had cleaned his wound and redressed it. When she had sat by his bed whilst he had a fever from infection constantly changing the cold compress on his forehead when it became clammy from his sweat. And she had never once complained.

Admittedly, Levi had offered him help multiple times since y/n had left but he never accepted it. How could the Commander of the Survey Corps ever accept help from his own captain. Especially on something so trivial as writing. He was the one who taught Levi to write he wasn't about to have Levi repeat the very same techniques back to him. It wasn't worth the embarassment.

But y/n hadn't even asked. She'd helped him without hesitation and he didn't even feel embarrassed for letting her. He was soother by her presence. Truly his love for her, like lighting, was electric.

Relaxing his hand and letting go of the pen he turned his hand over to hold y/n's for a moment a before standing from his chair.

Stepping back out of his way y/n smiled glad that she could help. Erwin's cheeks flushed as their eyes met before his eyes moved to her lips and their rosy colour. He thought about how he longed to kiss them.

Why must he stay in longing?

He told himself he'd never live his life with regrets and he was sure that this would be one of them if he didn't act soon.

Without another thought he moved his ink stained fingers up to her cheek smudging blue onto it as he moved his thumb across it. She smiled softly as their heads moved closer together. Tilting in opposite directions their eyes locking before fluttering closed. Simultaneously they drew closer together the only thing separating them was the breath that floated from their mouths into the sliver between them. Before their lips crashed together and all at once they were whole again.

Y/n hands snaked their way into Erwin's hair ruffling it just to irk him. He grumbled but didn't break the kiss. Instead he pulled them both back down into his desk chair. Parting for breath only briefly before returning to each others lips with an insatiable hunger. Until a knock at the door caused them to break apart. Concerned that they might be caught in the act.