Commander, Soldier, Spy (Erwin X Reader)

Chapter 55- Home

"He must really mean a lot to you." Piecks voice called out softly from her bed on the other side of the room.

I flinched startled hurriedly getting up and wiping my face

"Y/n. It's me. You don't have to pretend with me,remember?" She crawled down off her bed and leant against it beckoning for me to go over to her.

I nodded sniffling and went over where she enveloped me in a tight and warm hug.

"So you want to go back that badly huh?" She asked me softly.

I nodded

"Well I can understand why, I've seen photos of him!" She joked

I smiled slightly wiping my eyes again.

"He's more than that though...like I said before he's caring and strong and time stops when I'm around him. We can be doing the most boring task but when we're together nothing seems mundane." I rested my head on her as she gently brushed through my hair with her slender fingers.

"If you need help getting away then I'll help you. You know this right? I'll always be here for you." Pieck rubbed my shoulder lovingly. She was the closest thing I had to a true friend here. One whom I hoped would never change.

"It's impossible. I can't go back and I could never drag you into it either. What about your family?" I said with concern. She had always told me that she was here for them. To allow them to live better lives.

"My offer remains all the same. I've defended my family long enough." She stated firmly.

"B-but.... What about what they've taught us... They're devils..." Why would she help me if it meant her family might be unhappy. It didn't make any sense.

"I think both you and I know that it's mostly bullshit. Changing history to excuse war. They'll always do it but doesn't mean we have to blinded by it. Besides you can't help you fall in love with and I think you're smart enough not to fall for someone who isn't healthy for you. Right?"

"I sure hope so." I nodded still baffled by the conversation.

"Alright. So pack your bags. Take as little as possible. I'll get a message ahead for your arrival. That way he can get to you before the Military police do. And if anything major happens here while you're gone then I'll come and get you. Promise." She held out her pinky finger to me.

"You're crazy." I shook my head laughing a bit.

"Says you." She laughed back. "Just think about it yeah? Sleep on it." She pushed her pinky finger closer to me.

"Alright. I'll sleep on it." I joined my pinky with her's sealing the promise. Surely she would forget all about this by morning though, right? I thought as I tried to convince myself that we hadn't just made a binding agreement. I slowly got to my feet and walked over to my bed pulling off my uniform and slipping beneath my sheets. "Sleep well, Pieck"

"Sweet dreams Y/n!" She called out getting beneath her own sheets quickly drifting to sleep like always. Soft snores radiating around the room.

I tossed an turned for a couple hours before getting out of bed and sitting at the small desk that sat beside my bed. I opened my notebook and began to write.

I have lived a thousand moments
I have seen a thousand stars
I have heard a thousand voices
I have spoken a thousand words.

But none could ever describe you the way that would be true.
Not a wave in the sea or a bird in the sky that could ever represent you.

I have written a thousand letters
I have walked a thousand miles.
I have fought a thousand battles.
I have danced a thousand songs.

But none have ever held me so close in the way that you do.
Not a Wall or a Titan that could stop me from loving you.

I cringed. I was being sappy. I crumpled the paper in my hand shoving it into the desk drawer.

Ew

I got back into bed turning over pulling up my knees so I was in the fetal position and allowed myself to drift off.

I pictured that I was laying in field full of flowers. The breeze blew my hair gently and bees buzzed in the distance. The birds in the trees chirped happily as the sun shone through their branches causing dappled sunlight to caress my reddened cheeks.

My hand clasped another. I turned my face staring into the ocean that was his eyes.
We stayed that way for what seemed like hours until finally I grew restless. I sat up poking my head up above the tall flowers peering around for signs of any other life.

I got to my feet and began to skip around in the flowers before finally turning back towards where he once lay.

As I did so the sky turned a blood red and all the brightness left this beautiful scene. Not a flower insight only mud and barbed wire.

I began to search for him desperately trying to call out to him but my voice was lost too.
I began to run jumping over craters that had formed in the mud as rain began to pour down.

Eventually I saw him in the distance laying on his side in a puddle. As I got closer I could see that his left side was stained red with blood his skin pale and lifeless.

I began to weep helplessly over him trying to call for help but still no words would come.
I began to shake him desperately, his body limp.

I fell down into the mud on my back beside him screaming silently at the sky before forcing myself awake to escape the horrors of this nightmare.