Blue ; Timothée Chalamet

13.

Mature Content 

Blue and I enter his apartment, and my back is pushed against the cool metal of the elevator doors. Blue's lips are on mine again, and his hands are grabbing every inch of my body.  He grabs my hips and lifts me off my feet; my legs tangle around his waist. 

I need to stop; this is sending Blue the wrong idea; you KNOW he's in love with you. This can't go further.  

Blue kicks open his bedroom door with force; he gently lays me on his bed, our lips don't disconnect for a second. My face cupped in his hands as our tongues fight in each other's mouths. 

The tension between us is insane. I can feel it now. I feel every single feeling he's felt and more. My skin was burning for him, I needed to pull away and tell him we couldn't do this, but I couldn't. This high was only felt when injecting heroin. 

"Blue," I manage to get out.

He hums, answering back to me.

"Blue, stop, stop." I'm out of breath, kicking myself at the fact that this had to end.

Blue pulls away from me; he's hovering over me now, out of breath staring at me. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

His necklace swings in between us; I stare into his eyes. So much passion and fire, I can tell he's dreamed of this for so long. 

"Blue... we can't do this," I whisper.

He doesn't say anything; he swallows and rolls off of me. We lay next to each other for a while without a word spoken between us.

"I know." Blue finally responds.

My head turns towards him slowly. I stare at this side profile as he looks at the ceiling. 

"That was a good plan you had." I nudged his arm.

"No one's going to suspect two kids making out in a bathroom." He replies.

"Thank you." I turn to my side to look at him. 

He just stared at the ceiling; I knew he wanted to say something but couldn't get the words out. 

I waited.

"You're welcome..." He trails off before finishing his sentence. He sat up slowly, the sound of the comforter crackling underneath him. He couldn't look at me right now. "I knew once I did that... if I ever had the chance to do that... I wouldn't be able to stop unless you told me to."

I used my elbows to prop myself up, waiting for him to continue. 

"Fuck." He sighed hard. 

"I'm sorry, Blue, I didn't want to have sex-" 

"We weren't going to have sex, F." He turns and looks at me. 

"You seem disappointed in me." I sit up next to him.

He looks away for a second and shakes his head slowly, "I'm not at all." His eyes meet mine again. 

I wanted to grab him and kiss him. I felt so safe in his arms. I've never had a guy not use me for sex or not get angry when I didn't want to. The fireworks constantly explode when we kiss. His touch feels so comforting and right. I never felt like this towards Blue; I understand all the chaoticness surrounding him regarding women. My heart kept pounding, looking at him, his hand moved closer to mine.

"I've wanted to do that for so long... I'm not mad; I'm just taken back." Our eyes don't lose each other's gaze. 

I find myself leaning back into him slowly; I jerk back and look towards the floor.