Blue ; Timothée Chalamet

9.

  Warning: Drug use

I stand in front of my closet, debating on taking something I know I shouldn't. I walk in and head to the rear right corner behind some of my shoes. I kneel, grab the bottom shoebox. Inside held three different pill bottles. I sighed to myself. I promised I wouldn't do this again, but these were here just in case of an emergency. 

I pick up one of the bright orange bottles and read the label.

Percocet

I sigh and quickly open the bottle and take two out. I place the bottle back in the box and shove it back in my closet. I pop the pills in my mouth and swallow. I stay knelt for a few more minutes. I take a couple of deep breathes. 

I still couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that Blue was in love with me. I didn't understand; how did he hide it for this long? I put my face in my hands and take another deep breath. I stand up and join my parents in the kitchen.

 They got in from Los Angles about an hour ago. My dad was hovered over the stove, making dinner, and my mom was sitting down, drinking wine on her phone. I take a seat at the island and wait for dinner to finish cooking. My parents barely said a word to me since they arrived. 

After about twenty minutes, my dad finishes cooking, and we all sit down to eat. My eyes begin to feel heavy, and noise starts to muffle. I stare at my food as the percocets start to kick in. My parents talking to each other about their trip begins to dwindle. 

I lift my head to look at them, smiling at each other laughing. My dad sat at the head of the table, and my mom on his right. It seemed like his body was shifted towards her more. I stare at them, not retaining anything their hearing. It almost like I don't exist to them right now.

"Hi." I simply say.

They don't respond; they keep eating and laughing with each other. 

Everything starts to become slower. I blink a few times and blurt out. "I'm so fucking high, woah."

Still no reaction from them. 

"I took pills tonight," I say louder trying to interrupt their conversation. 

Nothing. Not a reaction from either of them. I wanted to smack their happy smirks off their faces.

I stare at them blankly. They honestly did not care about me. I didn't exist anymore. They didn't care about what I was doing. I push my plate while standing up abruptly. I grab my keys and head out the door. I slam it shut and don't look back.

I found myself entering Central Park. The sun was almost set, and everyone was heading out for the night. It was quiet, and the rustling of the trees made me feel peaceful. I didn't have a desire to be with my parents. If they didn't care about me, I didn't care about them. 

I walk a little way in until I need to sit. My eyes extremely heavy, and everything feels dreamlike. I find a bench and sit down for a couple of minutes. I find myself trying to keep my eyes open. I scoot down on the bench and lay down. I rest my head on my arm and close my eyes. 

I wake up to someone shaking me roughly. My vision extremely fuzzy, and the day has now turned into night. I blink a few times and sit up a little. 

"Frankie? Frankie?!" The voice slowly hits my ears.

I'm still too high. I rub my eyes and lookup.

"Frankie." Blue kneels in front of me. 

I'm surprised he's here. Was I dreaming? How did he find me?

"What- how-?" I hold the side of my head.

"Savannah told me your parents came into town." Blue held my other hand. "She hadn't heard from you and tracked your location here for hours." He pushed his hair back. "We got worried."

"What time is it?" I grip his hand tightly.

"Almost eleven o'clock." He stands up and takes his jacket off to wrap around me. "Did you take something, F?" 

I shake my head. "No, why would you think that?" 

"We've been blowing your phone up for hours, and I just found you sleeping on a dirty park bench." Blue's tone grows harsh. 

"I just wanted to get out of the house; my parents are there." I refuse to look at him as he sits next to me.

"No, they're not. I caught them as they were leaving." He clasps his hands in front of him and turns his head towards me. "They said they weren't sure where you went."

I scoff. 

"Come on, let's get you home," Blue says as he wraps his arm around me and helps me up.

I'm so screwed he knows I'm fucked up.

We enter the apartment sometime later with Blue still helping me stand. Blue brings me to my room and sets me on the bed. He takes off my shoes, and his jacket wrapped around me. 

"Do you have a shirt on under your sweatshirt?" Blue asks

I nod, lifting my arms, helping him take it off. Blue lifts the sweatshirt over my head with one hand and holding my shirt down with the other. My head pops out of the sweatshirt, and Blue is walking towards my closet, folding it up. 

I watch him as he does everything. I never realized how caring and sweet he was. I thought he did it all because he was my best friend, not because he loved me. I couldn't say anything to him. Savannah promised him, and I promised her. 

"Why are you so sweet to me, Blue?" My eyes heavy as I look up at him.

Blue crouches down and hands me some PJs. "Because I love you, F, you're my best friend." He smiles.

"Can you stay with me tonight?" I ask, rubbing my head.

"Of course, let me get you some water," Blue says as he leaves me alone with my thoughts.

I take the opportunity to change into the clothes Blue handed me. I drag my feet to the bathroom and wash my hands, face, and brush my teeth. I stare at myself in the mirror. God, I loved being high. I missed it so much. I felt so happy, confident, and alive. 

I shut off the bathroom light and head over to bed. Blue waiting for me by my side. He lifts the covers and helps me in. I slowly get in and rest my head on the pillow. I take a deep sigh. Even tho Blue is nice now; he won't be tomorrow morning when the high wears off. He'll press me with questions.

"Goodnight, F." Blue says while getting in bed and clicking off the table lamp.

"Goodnight, Blue." I moan, drifting to sleep