My Best Friends Brother

Chapter 34

MILO'S P.O.V.

Why the fuck hasn’t he called yet?

I mean, I love the three day wait rule as much as the next guy but this isn’t exactly a normal situation is it?

I guess it is for him though, he's probably got guys throwing themselves at him every fucking day.

Shit.

What if he's changed his mind? What if he woke up this morning and decided the best thing he could do is just pretend it didn’t happen... I’d be back to where I started, a guy enamoured with my brothers best friend, who never fucking notices me.

Eli’s car races past again, the dirt flying up off the track and hitting me in the face even though I’m as high up in the stalls as I can possibly get. It's fucking freezing today but I couldn’t just go home, May is at Hope's and I can’t be dealing with Mum fanning all over me when I get in. That’s how I ended up here, quivering my ass off and staring at a blank notification screen.

When I woke up this morning, I genuinely considered just sending him a message. I hardly fucking slept, checking my phone every few fucking minutes like a teenage girl waiting on her crush.

Lee came by at breakfast with Chase, she mentioned something to Dad about some shit that went down with Liam when Josh visited their place yesterday. I didn’t catch all of it but it sounded rough. I just want to make sure he’s okay.

My head keeps telling me to chill, that just because you ask someone to call you doesn't mean they actually fucking will. He's probably seriously stressed out going back to work after a week too, along with all that stuff with his brother. He probably hasn’t thought about me once.

Eli’s car whips past again, throwing up so much gravel into the wind I start to choke on the dust cloud left in his wake. He's looking good but I know when it comes to the competition on Saturday he'll be bricking it.

My phone buzzes, but my fire of excitement is immediately extinguished when I read it’s just another apology text from Zoe. She’s really not fucking helping me here.

I couldn’t even look at her in the halls today, news got out through the school about what happened between her and Luke while we were together. I may not be happy with her but I wasn’t going to just let people talk shit about her either, after I slammed the first guy that called her a slut into the locker I think news spread because she didn’t seem to get as much crap after that.

We were on the same table at lunch, but she knew better than to try and talk to me with the way I’m feeling. Her messages seem genuine, she said the whole kiss me thing was an idea from her aunt too make a big gesture and get me back. It’s not like I blame Zoe for following through on what that woman said, she’s always someone that’s bowed to the pressure put on her by others, I just wish she cared enough about me not to put me in that position.

In some ways it was the best thing she could have done, if she hadn't then who knows if I would have kissed Josh that night. It’s not like I had planned too, I just knew after I watched him walk away that I fucking had to.

Finally Eli’s car comes to a stop at the bottom of the benches, his racing coach going to the window and talking him through what he needs to do to improve. The guy can’t get much faster, he was practically laps ahead of every other person on the track tonight.

I’m surprised he actually let me come with him today, he usually lets me come to races if they are big ones but since the crash, he's been hesitant to have me sitting on the side-lines while he flaunts his ability to drive.

He really needs to get over this.

Dumping his helmet on the bottom step, he scales the benches until he's in the seat next to me. He's even more filthy than his car so he better keep his fucking distance from these jeans.

“What do you think? Teams looking good right. These lot better be on their A-game Saturday, if we lose to the boys from Newtown we are fucked. We'll never hear the end of it.”

Eli doesn’t like to admit that, but he knows it's true. The boys from Newtown destroyed them last season and if they have any hopes of recovering their reputation they need to run those guys off the course.

“Yeah man, you all look good.”

Staring back down at my phone, it's like watching a pot of water trying to boil. I know it won’t happen if I keep looking but I can’t fucking help myself.

It feels so weird to say, but I just really want to fucking talk to him, nothing else. Every time I think about the guy it’s like somebody’s hooked me up to a car battery, every inch of my body is alive with more electricity than it can possibly handle.

I’m craving him, I just need something to take the fucking edge off.

Fuck it, I’m calling him.

“Man, are you okay? You've been out of it all day. I told you to stop freaking out about the scout, he fucking loved you. Even Josh said he’d never seen anyone that excited to talk to a player in all the times he's been at camp.”

God, please don't say his name.

“I’ve got to make a call, I’ll be right back.”

Racing down the steps, I don’t stop until I’m deep inside the car park outside the race track. The buzz of engines is still in the air, the smell of gasoline strangely comforting as I continue to take deep breaths in order steady these raging nerves that refused to leave my fucking system.

Hey Josh. No, um. Hello? No. Fuck... How you doing? Oh great Milo, suddenly you’re Joey fucking Tribbiani.

Just act fucking natural you dork. He’s just a guy... A really fucking beautiful guy that makes your skin react in a way it never has before, that makes your heart pound and your breath hitch. A guy you’ve not stopped fucking thinking about since he walked into your life again... Fuck!

My finger hovers over that shining green phone button, the little fucker is taunting me.

I have literally never been like this with any fucking girl, even back when I was scrawny and none of them even noticed my presence, I never felt this rush at the idea of just hearing their fucking voice.

My thumb is just millimetres from the screen when suddenly the whole thing vibrates. For a second I convince myself I’ve hit the button and pull the silent phone to my ear just to be safe. Of course it’s silent. You are an absolute fucking mess right now Milo Thompson.

The moment I read those words though, I couldn’t care less how much of a jumping dick I look. My whole stomach cramps with the wave of butterflies attempting to escape it. The smiling picture attached to his contact just makes it so much fucking better as I stare back at his gorgeous face. Fuck he looks good there.

‘Hey, movie at my place Saturday night?’

His place. He wants me to go to his place. Fuck.

It’s fine, I’m fine. You really need to calm yourselves people because I am absolutely fucking fine. I’m fine. Oh great, now I’m Ross.

If you could all just tell my fingers that I’m fine so I can actually fucking respond I’d really appreciate it, they haven’t stopped shaking since I read his name.

I don’t want the conversation to end, I kind of want to do everything just to talk to him again, but knowing him he’s in a similar state to how I am right now, so I don’t want to push it.

The truth Milo, you can never go wrong with the truth.

‘Can’t wait..’

I really fucking can’t.

Resting back against Eli’s car, the cold evening sky has changed from it's warm shades of tangerine into the dark depths of the navy sea. I swear those stars are smiling at me, they are so fucking bright tonight.

Do you think he can see them too? That he knows last night I spent half my time staring out the window picking out every constellation I showed him and wondering if he was doing the same thing.

The stars are universal, a language anybody can understand. At any point, anywhere in half the world, somebody could be looking at the exact same star as you without you ever even knowing it. It’s why I love them so much, they connect so many of us with invisible tethers that we all walk around blissfully unaware of.

Mythology states that humans were originally born with four arms, four legs and two faces. That the God Zeus was so jealous of them that he split their bodies in half, so they would spend eternity searching the world for the person that would complete them. It’s said the sign the God's sent to show that two souls had indeed united, was the display of a shooting star falling from the sky to bind their bodies together as one under its guidance.

I always kind of hoped that one day, I’d watch one fall for me. That it would show me I’d found my other half, that I’d finally be fucking complete.

My phone lights up, the only thing brighter tonight then the glowing predestination of infinity above me, is my smile when I realise it’s from him.

‘Me neither... kind of miss you.’

Fucking hell, if this guy makes me smile anymore I’m gonna crack my fucking cheekbones.

What am I supposed to say to that that won’t make me sound like an absolute soppy shit? What I really want to say to him is that I don’t kind of miss him, I really fucking miss him. Fuck it.

‘Kind of miss you more..’

My nerves spike again the moment I send the message but what else could I say? I really do fucking miss him.

Eli smacks my shoulder and I almost punch the twat straight in his happy fucking face, he should know better than to sneak up on people. May almost broke his nose when he jumped out at her from the bathroom last month, pretty sure she’s still plotting her revenge. He’s definitely losing a limb.

“What’s got you smiling like that? Oh shit, you got a fucking girl on the go or something? About fucking time, I was scared you were going to join the priesthood at this rate.”

“Dude, it's been like a week.”

Eli unlocks the car and I slip into the passenger seat out of this fucking cold. He hates this thing, it's still got the learner sticker his mum had put on the windscreen stained into the glass, but it’s better than having nothing to drive at all though, trust me.

“Exactly! It’s been a fucking week! It’s not healthy to let your balls get this blue man, so who is she?”

I smiled to myself; someone special. “No one you know.”

My phone buzzes again and this time I don’t try to suppress my grin.

‘Don’t think that’s possible..’

Saturday can’t come soon enough..

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