Chapter 128

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MILO'S P.O.V.

Okay, I knew the whole me having a boyfriend now thing would be on a few peoples tongues this morning, but like fuck did I think it would be this fucking bad.

Walking through to my locker I can feel every set of fucking eyes on my body, I'm used to people looking at me don't get me wrong, but this is a whole other level of intense.

Is it really that big a fucking deal? It sure as fuck wasn't like this when Leanna started dating the girl off the volleyball team, so why the hell is everybody getting so bent out of shape about me and Josh?

Maybe it was this bad for them, maybe I just didn't bother to fucking notice...

Even a few of the teachers can't seem to tear their eyes away from me, I'm starting to get pissed off now. Eli has been using his overwhelming presence to try and block their view but even with all my confidence this is starting to fucking get to me.

Of course maybe it also has something to do with the posters that are plastered everywhere including the front of my fucking locker right now.

'Ten year memorial of the Westbrooke high school shooting to take place this coming Saturday. Never forget.'

Ten years. Feels like fucking yesterday I was smashing my head into a table to try and shield May from the bullets I was convinced we're coming for her.

Josh is trying to cover it up but I can see how much it's affecting him, he asked me on the phone last night if it would be okay for me to give him some space on that day and I completely get why. It's a fucking rough day for them all.

Speaking with Lee and Brie in the past about their process, I'm assuming it's mostly going to involve him destroying his liver for twenty four hours and letting out all the crap he keeps in for the rest of the year in that one day. I don't know if this year will be easier or harder considering everything that's happening between us, but he knows I'm here for him if he changes his mind. I'll make sure I'm not far from him... although I'd rather be right next to him.

"Dude, this is getting kind of ridiculous now. They're all acting like you're fucking Liam Hemsworth or something, which I guess you kind of are, but that's besides the point." Eli shoots another warning glare at one of the juniors who attempt to come over and say something.

They might have just been trying to be nice but I really can't take another person offering me a fake congratulations, only to go on to ask a bunch of seriously personal fucking questions that no one ever fucking asked when I got a girlfriend.

I dump out my stuff from second period and pick up my next set of books but my head is just really not in this place today. Usually I let shit like this just wash over me but between Mum, Jayce, and now all this overload of unnecessary attention on top... It's just getting a bit fucking match.

It would be really handy right now if someone accidentally sent a nude photo to the biology teacher or something, because it would take a load of the heat off of me. Any volunteers? It doesn't feel like it would take much for me to talk Eli into doing it...

He sticks by my side as we walk towards history, I'd already spoken to most of the guys on the team already and they've all been super supportive but I think it's because they've met Josh and understand who he is. Everyone else has a serious fucking opinion and I don't need to hear it.

Just as we turn down the corridor for class I see Luke turning up from the other side. We'd seemed to have settled our crap since we started doing that project but I haven't forgotten what him and his poor fucking excuse for a father said about Josh, so I've kind of been waiting for him to come out with his fucking piece.

The moment he sees us his whole body freezes. Okay, I guess that he's heard already then. He hasn't answered a single one of my fucking texts since we spoke at the party and I'm still not sure what the fuck I'm supposed to be doing with him. He needs out of that house.

"Luke!" Luke steps back as I step forward, keeping an exact distance between us until he backs his way right out of the doors on the other side of the hall into the fields. I get ready to chase after him until I realised that Eli is still stood in the exact same spot, just staring out at the door repeatedly hitting against the wall before it eventually slams shut.

What the hell is going on with these two?

I snap my fingers in front of his face and he breaks from his petrification, looking around at the empty hallway like he hadn't fully processed that Luke had left yet before taking hold of my arm.

"We need to talk." Eli's mammoth hands keep a tight hold as he pulls me through into the guys bathroom, kicking against each of the stall doors to make sure they're empty before letting his hands slam down on the sink and leaning his head against the mirror.

That dude knows that this is a high school right? That shit he's resting his face on probably has skin eating bacteria all over it.

"Eli... What did you do now?" I know that face, that's his 'I just accidentally slept with the girl I'm seeing's identical twin sister' face. It's only happened twice but I still recognise it.

"Luke knows about the crash. He knows I was driving."

Oh shit.

"How the fuck does he know?" Eli continues to press his head against the disgusting glass as he tries to cool down pressure radiating through it. We were seriously fucking careful after the crash, even the fucking cops never figured it out. I didn't even tell May! We promised we'd never tell anyone... it's the one secret he's actually managed to keep.

Eli would be the worst poker player, every emotion he has is so clearly written on that perfectly sculpted face of his. The guilt right now tells me that he broke that fucking promise.

"I don't know why the fuck I told him! He was just being a wanker and saying all this shit about you being a selfish prick so I just snapped! By the time I realised what I'd said it was too fucking late. He told me to tell you something too, about his dad, that if you told people about his dad then he'll tell people about the crash. He didn't explain but I'm guessing you understand what the fuck he means?"

Oh yeah, I fucking know. What I don't know is why the fuck he's insistent on protecting this guy?!

"Did he say anything else? Do anything else?" Being indebted to Luke is really the last fucking thing I needed today. If the guy decides to start acting like a prick again then he could hold this over us for fucking eternity.

Eli shakes his head, he refuses to make eye contact with me which is always a definite sign that he's full of shit but I'm not in the right headspace to be digging through his mind right now.

I'll ask him later. He's got some swelling on his jaw but honestly I thought maybe someone just threw up on her bed or something at the party and he was too slow to avoid her over gesturing hands again. He strokes over it at every mention of Luke's name so it's not hard to see the things are related.

The bell for class rings loudly but the pounding in my head is enough to tell me that the last fucking thing I need is to be sitting through a lecture on the fucking Tudor's right now. Divorce, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived, we all know the fucking drill mate.

"You go. Tell him I've had to go see Coach about something, you know Coach will cover." Eli agrees before slipping out through the doors but I just slot myself into one of the cubicles and fall down onto the lid of the seat.

Class isn't what I need. He is what I need.

Pulling my phone out of my bag, my fingers work faster than my mind until I'm staring down at the contact of the one person I really need to speak to right now, Josh's smiling face staring back up at me like a beacon of hope in the chaos that is my fucking life right now.

I don't regret telling the world about us, I just wish that people would back the fuck off and let us live our fucking lives without their fucking input.

He's in work, but even if he can't answer the call his voicemail is usually enough to calm the fires in my soul. Just as my finger hovers over the green button the doors to the bathroom swing open and two pairs of footsteps follow. I'd really rather people didn't hear me have a mushy conversation with my boyfriend right now so if they could hurry up and fuck off that would be great.

"Man, I swear down that's exactly what I heard. The old guy is like fifty or something! As if it's not bad enough that Thompson is riding fucking stick now, he's doing it with a fucking grandpa too."

Are these cunts serious right now?

My phone slips from my hand straight back into my bag as I get ready to go smash some fucking heads in.

"That's fucking sick! Dude's disgusting! The guy has probably been grooming him since he was a kid or something... Do you think that Zoe chick will stop crying after him long enough for us to all get a fucking go on her now? In that uniform... I wouldn't mind being on the top of her fucking pyramid." They both cackle and every drop of blood in my veins burns as it courses through my body. Fuck this.

I swing the door of the stall open so fast that the two little fuckers almost shit themselves, getting ready to grab their heads and feed them to the toilets when I realise these kids or just that... They're fucking kids.

This must be their first year in high school, neither of them coming close to reaching my shoulders as they both stare up at me completely fucking terrified.

"You got something you want to say to my fucking face?" I want to tear them to pieces but I have to keep reminding myself that nobody is the best version of themselves at that age, too desperate to fit in and willing to compromise everything else about themselves to achieve that. I actually fucking pity them.

I was never like that, even as a child I never understood the way that people would hate. It never made any sense to me and it still doesn't. I guess that's why I like Liam so much, he's so much more like me than he is like this lot.

Neither of them say a word, I swear one of the little shits is on the verge of pissing himself as I take a step closer to them before heading straight for the door. There's a gasp of relief from the otherside as I slam it shut and at least I know two people in this school won't be saying shit again.

My head is fucking pounding now and there's no way I'm going to make it here until the end of the day, I just need a fucking break from it all. It's too much. I shouldn't even be here, I should be in fucking college where no-one would give a fuck and I wouldn't be surrounded by fucking fetuses.

I walk straight into someone as I step out of the room but my eyes are getting so cloudy from the tension in my head that I can't even make out who the fuck they are, so I just mumble an apology whilst continuing to head towards the doors. The blaring sunlight coming in through the glass windows only increases the pounding in my frontal lobe, everything overwhelming my senses and I just need it to fucking stop!

A familiar door comes into sight on my left and I pull it open before throwing myself inside, slamming it behind me and not being remotely bothered by the overwhelming scent of bleach as I embrace the darkness of the cupboard.

A sliver of light beacons its way into the room from under the door but I drown it out by shoving the heels of my hands directly into my eyes. The pain from the pressure is actually a nice distraction from what's happening in my head.

I'm strong, I'm really fucking strong and I know what I want. I want Josh, I want to be with Josh, I just don't want it to feel so fucking hard to do right now.

Jayce told me about this cupboard way back when I first started in high school, it was where him and Lee used to come to meet up when they were sneaking around back then. He kind of implied that it might make a good space to clear my head but I think deep down he was just hoping to keep that Thompson stud mentality going through to the next generation.

Water begins to coat my palms, less actual tears and more simple lubrication as the pressure I'm applying increases tenfold when a sudden blare of light fills the room, before it disappears again.

I almost jump out of my skin when I feel a hand touch my arm, I didn't realise someone had come in. Peering out through blurry vision to see a hazy figure holding out a bottle of water in one hand and two pills in her perfectly manicured other one.

She slides into the empty space next to me, not saying a word but encouraging me to take the pills and drink as much water as I can, until I can finally make out her long dark locks again.

Zoe.

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