Heaven Help Us

Lying

As soon as we got into the museum, I let Jeph go observe the art while I dialed Rain. I knew the owners and workers, so I was assured in the fact that I wouldn’t have to tell Rain that I lost our son.

“Hey, babe, what’s up? How’d it go with Juliet?” She answered.

“Yeah, um, that’s kind of why I called.” I said, feeling sick to my stomach again.

“Oh, god, is everything okay?”

“I’ll tell you when we get home, but just…Get home when you can, okay? Jeph and I will probably be there in about an hour.”

“Okay, yeah, I’ll head home in a bit. We’re wrapping up recording for the day, anyways.”

“Alright. I love you, Rain.”

“I love you, too. You’re sure you don’t want to talk about it right now?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

“Whatever it is, it’ll be alright.” She assured me. It did help with my nerves, but I still felt kind of sick.

We hung up and then I walked around the museum with Jeph for a little while.

When we got home, Jeph and Batman ran to his room. Dante and Brooklyn were in the kitchen talking and making a snack of some sort.

When they saw me, they both pointed to Rain’s room.

Dante looked at me warningly. “This better not be about what I think it’s about. She’s fucking terrified right now. Remember what I told you.”

“Trust me, I remember, and this isn’t what you’re thinking. I swear.” I said before heading to Rain’s room.

She was sitting on her bed staring at a wall.

I sat next to her.

“Hey,” She looked at me. Her makeup was slightly smeared, so I could tell that she’d been trying really hard not to cry too much.

“It’s okay, babe,” I found myself reassuring her.

“What happened?” She asked.

“She…she said she…she has a daughter, and she said that it’s…she said that the kid is mine.” I struggled to force out.

“But, I mean…how old…what?”

“I don’t know,” I said, leaning forward and holding my head, lightly tugging on my hair. “The kid looked maybe around ten, so I guess it’s possible, but…god, I can’t handle this. The kid can’t be mine.”

She frowned at me. “That’s what you said about Jeph before he was born.”

“Yeah, I know, but I was in total denial. I’ve seen this kid, it can’t be mine. I always, always used protection when I was with Juliet.”

“It doesn’t work all the time, Andy.”

“Yes, Rain, I’m aware. But she swore up and down that she was on the pill and just…it can’t be mine.” I sighed, frustrated. I could feel it turning into an overwhelming feeling of sadness, disappointment, anger, and doubt.

I looked up at Rain. “She’s lying. I know she’s lying.”

I could see my own emotions reflected on Rain’s face.

“But, you didn’t…” I started. “You wouldn’t…Jeph…mine…I know…but-”

She quickly caught onto what I was saying. “Jeph is yours. I wouldn’t lie.”

I couldn’t stop myself from reaching up and kissing her.

“Please…please promise me…” I muttered into the kiss.

“I swear to you, Jepha is your son.”

I nodded and she pulled me back into the kiss.

It’s like we were trying to escape everything, trying to let out all of our emotions but at the same time forcing them back in. I felt like my world was collapsing but being held up at the same time.

“Please…” I didn’t even know what I was asking for anymore. I just wanted Rain.

Dante walked by to go to Jeph’s room, and then backtracked. “Brooklyn and I are taking Jeph to the park, we’ll be back in an hour,” He said and then shut the door.

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I can update again tonight if you all want. :) (Also, who else is super happy that Fall Out Boy got back together?!?!)