Heaven Help Us

Merry Fucking Christmas

We pulled up outside the house, and Raven came running out with a grin on his face.

"Hey, Rain, how many presents this year? Who's in the bus to help out?"

"Everybody except for Damon, who is with Jeph on the DTY bus." I handed him an armload of presents and Asher helped him open the door.

Ashley, CC, Brooklyn, Dante, and Andy all helped unload the gifts, and Jimmy, Austin, Raven, Jake, Jinxx, everybody else, and myself helped take them inside and put them under the tree.

Hugs were exchanged, along with "I'll see you tomorrow"'s, and then everyone, excluding Andy was gone.

Raven had just gone outside to get Jeph, still very much unaware that Andy was around.

Upon coming inside, Jeph resting his head on Raven's shoulder, he stopped at the doorway and stared at Andy, Dante, and I.

I could see the change in his eyes as they went from shock to intense anger. "Rain, what the hell-"

He started, before Dante quickly set down the last gift and swooped in and took Jeph from Raven.

"I'll take him up to bed." Dante muttered, walking off in the direction of Jeph's bedroom.

As soon as Dante and Jeph were out of earshot, the equivalent of hell broke loose.

"What the fuck is he doing here after what happened? He has no right to be in our house!" Raven started.

Asher, hearing the yelling, came in to see what was going on and hooked his hand around Raven's arm. "Calm down, I'm sure that this can be worked out without so much yelling."

"Shut up, Asher." Raven said through gritted teeth.

Ash looked surprised. "You know what, Raven? Calm the fuck down. Your temper gets you in far too much trouble and it's Christmas fucking Eve. Chill out."

Raven shrugged him off and looked at me. "And you. What the hell are you thinking? He's just going to hurt you again! And getting Jeph's hopes up like this. Does Jeph know? What am I thinking, of course he probably knows. You're so very vocal about everything. I may be your brother, but Sammi, Jinxx, Ashley, Jake,a nd everybody...they were Andy's friends first. They never told him Jeph was his son, even though anybody could have guessed. But they all knew and they never said anything. Because you asked them not to. If I were Andy I would feel so betrayed. But I'm glad I'm not Andy, because then I don't have to feel this." He yelled, and before any of us could process what happened, Andy had dropped to the ground clutching his stomach. "Merry fucking Christmas," Raven said, and left, slamming the front door behind him.

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Sorry it's been a while since I updated. But I feel I have to tell you something, so that you understand why they've been becoming so far apart and short. A few months ago, I stopped cutting. I felt like things were getting better. I had friends, family, dreams were literally coming true, I had my Wattpad fans, and this story. About a week ago, I relapsed. But so much worse this time. I lost the majority of my friends, my dreams fell apart, and so did I. I've always tried to seem happy on here because you all deserve a happy writer. Not some fucked up wanna-be rockstar-artist on drugs and who drinks too much. If I were to find the average for the ages of my readers, I'm probably around that age. Tomorrow? I'm going to regret this. Right now? I feel you deserve the truth. Yeah, I'm gonna keep writing this story. Why? Because people who write a story that a lot of people enjoy, and then stop writing it out of nowhere piss me off. As for all of you. I adore you all. In my mind, you're all stronger and better than I am, which is probably very true, and it makes me feel happy to know that you think I'm a good writer. To the ones who will ditch this story because of this little confession, fuck you. Because you're obviously douches. But, yeah. My readers are magnificent.