Stay

24

I watched Colby walk out of the bathroom before stepping out of the bath. I walked over to Colby's sink and grabbed the towel and dried my hair off before drying my body. I set the towel on the floor. I sighed when I saw myself in the mirror. I brought my left hand to my loose skin on my stomach. I was proud of myself for losing weight last year but my loose skin made me feel disgusting. I blinked quickly when I felt tears stinging my eyes. 

I opened the bag Colby brought in and smiled softly. He must have talked to quin to get the right stuff. I grabbed the box of tampons went to the toilet did my business and washed my hands. I put on the clothes that Colby set on the counter. I pulled the big t-shirt over my my self it stopped right under my knees and slipped on my underwear.

I slowly walked back into Colby's room I still felt bad about his bed. I looked to my right and saw Colby at his desk editing. "There's my girl" he said softly as he opened his arms. I slowly walked over and he pulled me into his lap. I sighed and rested the side of my head on his shoulder.

He kissed my forehead and smiled "Quin told me about your Ehlers Danlos why didn't you tell me" He said. I groaned and stood up. "Because I hate being treated like a I'm made of glass" I said. "But Marissa you kinda are fragile Quin told me about the cronic pain and other stuff" He said.

"Ugh well did she also tell you it includes Over flexible joints,  Loose joints that dislocate easily, Joint pain, Stretchy and fragile skin that bruises easily, Non-healing damaged skin' Muscle pain, Extreme tiredness, Dizziness, Increased heart rate especially after standing, and Heart valve problems" I said. Colby sat there with a look of sympathy on his face.

"See that's what I don't want" I said. "What" he said standing up. "That look of sympathy the look that makes me feel like I'm like a flower in a tornado that can't do anything but break, Ok yes I'm diseased and yes I can get hurt easily and have chronic pain but I don't want to let it dictate my life" I said starting to cry and walked out of the room.

Colby started to follow. "Please just leave me alone for awhile" I said before I quickly went downstairs and into my room. I shut my door and flopped down on my bed. I was surprised yo see my bed made with clean sheets Colby probably did that. I winced when I landed on my heart monitor. I went to move it to the side but my hands kept getting caught in the wires. I got frustrated and ripped them off the sticker pads came with them and threw the monitor across the room as I cried harder.

I looked down at the stitches in my hand that were still there. I flexed my hand and immediately regretted it as pain shot through my hand. It reminded me off when mark would dig his nails into my palm in public so he could still hurt me just not noticeable.

I started to feel something it wasn't panic or fear though. No this was white hot anger. I looked over to my box of pictures and immediately grabbed the smaller box that was inside. I had separated the pictures of me with Mark Elizabeth Kara and Avery a while ago because they were to painful too look at. I threw on some black sweatpants and grabbed the lighter for my candle and  some scissors along with the small box and marched outside.

I walked to the fire pit and I grabbed some wood and lighter fluid. I put the wood in and sprayed it in lighter fluid. I lit a small piece of cardboard and threw it in igniting the wood almost immediately. 

I sat on the stone bench that surrounded the fire pit. I opened the box and started to sob wwith anger I started ripping up pictures and throwing them into the fire. I went back into my room and grabbed the keys to my jeep. I walked out side unlocked my jeep and grabbed boxes and emptied every one onto the driveway collecting everything I had that was from Mark and Elizabeth. Clothes jewelry glass figurines they got when they went on a family vacation with Kara And Avery but not me, cards, christmas ornaments and other random shit. I filled a box with the shit and brought it to the back yard.