Stay

36

Colby and I laid there catching our breath for a few minutes. "Marissa" Colby said. "Hmmm" I hummed. "No more weighing yourself ok you are so perfect to me and seeing you feel like this breaks my heart. Just promise me you will let me know when your feeling this  way and let me help you" He said. I nodded and looked up at him. "I promise" I said

We laid that way for awhile before I looked at the time it was 11:45pm. I sat up and stretched my arms. I went to stand up. "M what are you doing" Colby said. "I have to clean myself up and take my medicine and let Astra out" I said. He sat up and smiled "Your still shaking a little just relax for a second and get your bearings" He said.

"I'm Ok" I said. "Ok whatever you say" He said. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up. As soon as I did I hit the floor hard. "Owww what the fuck" I said. Colby jumped out of bed and ran over to me. "Are you ok" He said worried 

"No I'm not your dick broke me" I said. He chuckled "I told you to wait love" He said and helped me up. He helped me to the bathroom and sat me on the edge of the bath. He went over to start the shower and I looked down and my wobbly legs.

"Baby you don't have to help me" I said. "Your right I don't have to I want to plus aftercare is a big thing ok just let me help" He said and came back over to me. "ok" I whispered. He helped me into the shower and got in with me. 

We showered then got out my legs were better. I gasped "Babe Kiwi what about Kiwi" I said frantically. "Hey I took care of it I fed her and everything and I let her out when you were changing she is ok" Colby said. I sighed relieved "Sorry" I said. "Marissa you have nothing to be sorry for" He said. I just nodded and dried my hair with a towel and Colby put his sweatpants on and left the room. 

I wrapped the towel around myself and brushed my teeth and took my medicine. I walked back into Colby's room and picked my underwear up and put them on along with the sweatshirt. I crawled into bed and got comfy. Colby came back into the room a few minutes later with Astra.

He put Astra on the bed then got in next to me. He wrapped his right arm around my waist and pulled me my back against his chest. "I love you babygirl" He said "I love you too babe" I said. as I let sleep take me.

I woke up the next morning and looked at the time. It was 8:45am. I yawned and rolled over. I went to cuddle Colby but he wasn't there. I sat up confused. "Babe" I said but no answer. "Colby" I said a little louder getting worried. Still no answer I got out of bed in my sweatshirt and underwear. I checked the room but he wasn't in there.

I started to panic. I ran downstairs "COLBY" I yelled. I ran and looked out the front door and saw his car was still here. I went into the kitchen the office and my room and couldn't find him I went to the backdoor. I was crying now "COLBY PLEASE WHERE ARE YOU" I cried.

I heard clanking in the garage and froze. I ran into the kitchen and grabbed a knife and slowly walked over to the garage door. I heard more clanking I slowly grabbed the door handle and took a deep breath. I swung the door open and held up the knife.

Only to see Colby working out. He stood up and took his headphones off. "Baby what's wrong" He said. I dropped the knife and ran over to him I wrapped my arms around his neck and sobbed into his bare chest. "I couldn't find you and you didn't answer me a...and I thought someone was in here I..I was so scared that something happened to you" I cried.

 Colby wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly. "I'm sorry babygirl I couldn't hear you  with my headphones on." He said then brought his hands to my face gently making me look up at him. "But I'm ok alright are you" He said and I nodded.

"Ok lets go inside" He said and grabbed my hand. We went inside and he shut the door to the garage. We walked upstairs and into Colby's room. Astra was asleep on the couch snoring. I walked over and sat next to her and Colby went to shower.

I scrolled through my phone till Colby walked out in his black tank top and acid wash jeans. "Baby" Colby said. "Yes" I said and looked up. He was standing there with my heart monitor in his hands. "M you need to wear this" He said. I nodded and stood up and he helped me put it on.

I went downstairs into my room and got dressed. I put on a blue sports bra and old baggy grey oversized t-shirt with black leggings. I did my mascara and brows and left my hair down. I walked out and into the kitchen where Colby was and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

I sat down at the table by the pool table and sighed and took a drink of my water. Colby came over and sat next to me. "Here M" He said handing me my medicine. I just stared at the medicine in his hands for a minute before I grabbed them. I took them and drank some of my water. "I hate this" I said. "I Know baby I know" Colby said and stroked my arm.

Colby stood up and kissed my head. He grabbed a yogurt from the fridge and a spoon and came and sat back down and handed it to me. "I'm not hungry" I said. "Please just a little bit princess" He said. I shook my head as my eyes welled with tears. "I wish I could understand how your feeling but I can't but I know someone who can" He said. I looked at him confused. 

"Remember Amber she is gonna try and help you she is on her way" He said. "Ok" I whispered. I was nervous I love amber and she is so kind but I don't want her to see me like this. I stood up and went into my room. Astra was curled up on my bed snoring. I went and laid on the bed next to her. 

I looked at the ceiling as tears rolled down my cheeks. I laid there for awhile before the door bell rang. I heard Colby open the door and greet Amber and let her inside. Astra jumped of the bed and ran out through my door that was open about a foot. I rolled over so my back was facing the door.

I heard Colby and Amber walk into the living room. I heard them talking but couldn't tell what they were saying. They talked for awhile before I heard a soft knock. "M Amber is here" Colby said. I didn't say anything because I was feeling embarassed and just like I'm not worth all this worry and don't deserve there help.

I heard footsteps walk over then saw Colby and Amber walk in front of me. Amber crouched down to look into my eyes. "Hey Marissa" She said. "Hi" I whispered. "I'm gonna give you two some space" Colby said and left my room and shut the door.

"Mind if I sit" Amber asked. I shook my head ad sat up and she sat next to me. "Colby told me you don't want to eat" She said. I nodded and looked down at my hands and picked my nails. "Can you tell me why" she asked. I took a deep breath as a tear fell down my cheek. "Because I don't want to gain weight again and feel gross I can't" I said

"I know how your feeling Marissa just try to start eating something small for your stomach baby steps ok" she said. I nodded and she hugged me as I started to cry. "Shhhhh  were gonna help you. Colby is making you something right now ok." She said. 

She helped me under the covers and sat on the other side of the bed with her arm around me and stroked my hair. We sat that way for a little while before Colby walked in. He had a bowl in his hands and he walked over to my side of the bed and sat down. "Here sweetheart" He said and handed me the bowl.

It was chicken noodle soup with some crackers mixed in. He handed me a spoon and I frowned. "Its ok Marissa remember baby steps" Amber said. I sniffled and nodded and slowly started to eat the soup. I finished the bowl and laid down. Amber and Colby left the room. I thought to myself that I couldn't do it.

(Authors note: Sorry this took so long I've been traveling)