Lonely Tears S2: My Beginning, End and Ever After

PART 22: Damnation

WAR POV

It's hilarious when you're the one who says you hate him and are disgusted by him, yet watching someone approach him already drives you insane and you can't control your emotion.

Yeah, that's me.

This is not the first time I became jealous because of him and I hate that. I hate someone like him, I hate people touching him, I hate people flirting with him and I hate everything.

Don't call me dumb because I already know it.

I'm the dumbest person in the world and congrats to me.

He showed and proved to me everything that he already changed but I still in silence judge him by the past and didn't put trust in him, instead I let other people influence my mind and made the thing worse.

I walked from the field to my building slowly, the tears running down my cheeks as I couldn't put into words the regret and stupidity I feel right now.

I walked to the parking lot earlier as soon as I realized Yin already walked away because I didn't bring my car as I wanted to go back with him but when I arrived, Earn was already there with him, ready to leave.

"War," someone grabbed my hand and I looked at the person.

I bowed my head while the tears were still flowing down and he cupped my face.

"Why are you crying?" Yin asked worriedly and wiped my tears with his hand.

"And why do you walk? Are you not coming with your car?"

I shook my head.

How could someone be so kind like him? Even though I hurt him so badly but he's still here, worrying about me.

He never put the blame on me after everything I did and kept apologizing to me about everything that happened in the past.

But what's the difference between him and me? People are judging him but the fact is we hurt each other. He hurt me in the past but now, I hurt him.

"Who makes you cry? Tell me."

I didn't answer, instead I burst out crying like a baby, looking at him with my trembling body.

"Let's go back," he was still wiping my tears.

"Come with me." He pulled my hand to go to his motorbike that he parked not far from there.

"Are you okay to ride a motorbike with me?" He asked, maybe he worried if I didn't feel comfortable because I always told him to distance himself from me.

I nodded.

He didn't ask me to hug him like he normally did when I was riding with him on his motorbike but I hugged him tightly and rested my face on his back. He was taken aback by my move but he said nothing and continued riding.

He sent me to my building and after I got off from his motorbike, I didn't move, still standing beside him as I gave him a sign to send me to the front door and he got off from his motorbike, walking me to my room.

"Go take a rest," he said after we arrived at my room and wanted to caress my hair but he stopped as he felt he had no right to do it. I always like when he do it, caressing my hair but my ego, my trauma, my stupid though always tried to deny it.

"I will go now."

"Yin..." I called him before he walked away.

My tears flowed down again when he looked at me.

Since we met again after almost two years, he had already proven to me that he was always trying to change to be a better person and didn't want anything that had happened in the past to happen again but I still didn't believe him and let my past memories manipulate my mind.