Lonely Tears S2: My Beginning, End and Ever After

PART 34: Somberness

A MONTH LATER

YIN POV

People said a one month anniversary is a time when everything in the relationship with your partner changes. The first month of your connection is a kind of barrier, which you steadily work through to develop and strengthen your love.

Yeah, it's kinda true because we both changed a lot, we became more in love with each other and couldn't stop our love from increasing every single day. I thought I already loved him enough but every morning I woke up, looking at him sleeping soundly beside me made my love for him grow. With every passing day, I love him more.

"I will go to your room after my class finishes," War sent a message to me. He promised to help me pack my bag because I'm leaving for a week long football camp in Chiang Mai the next day. I'll then spend the night in his room as I always did and I didn't even know if I have my own room now because I always spent my time in his room every single day.

"Okay my little boy :p"

I smiled while replying to his message and a blow to my head stopped me from smiling from ear to ear. "You look like a crazy person, ashhole," Off said after hitting my head.

"Why? Are you jealous because you are single?"

He rolled his eyes and mimicked my voice. "Did you and him already...." He paused and shot me a nasty glance.

"What?" I furrowed while my hands were busy replying to War's message.

"You want me to mention it?"

I simply hummed as I didn't even pay attention to what he was saying because my attention solely on my cute boyfriend who didn't stop sending me a love sticker and continued made me grin like a lunatic.

"Did you and him already have a sex?" Off asked flatly, making me choke my own saliva and I could feel my face starting to become red.

"Are you crazyyy? Why did you ask me a question like that?" I clear my throat, trying to act calmly even though I know my heart could explode any moment when thinking about that.

Yeah, we never did it yet or did everything that led to that. The far we did was kissing and tasting each other's mouth for a few minutes but I would always stop it abruptly because I know it's so hard to control myself to not be affected by the kiss. Even his touching me already made me shiver and could you imagine how difficult it is for me to control myself every night when he sleeps beside me?

Love is not based on sex but based on respect, trust, loyalty and love is beyond than having a sex. I mean love is kind words, a reassuring smile, so I didn't want us to do it without his willingness or he wasn't ready.

In an intimate relationship between two people who love each other, sex just isn't about getting the cock off or needing to be fucked but its an expression of love. You love that person and you want them in your life, you care about them and concern yourself with their wellbeing, so I did what I should do. Even though it's hard for me to control myself and sometimes I need to wake up in the middle of the night and rush to the toilet because of him without him realizing it, I want to respect and value him more than anything else. I didn't want to touch him more than I should without his consent.

"How could you control yourself?" Off asked while making a shocked expression and covered his mouth with his palm as he could read my mind when he asked me that question.

"What do you mean?" I asked back.

"It's more than a month since you are officially together."

"Then?" I raised my eyebrows.