I just need to cry. Okay?

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- Ariana's POV -

As my eyes flutter open this morning I feel different. Not a bad kind of different but sad and exited at the same time. Today, later today I leave to go to Kansas City for the first stop on my world arena tour! I mean how incredible is that! What makes me sad about it is the fact that I'm leaving family behind along with my friends, most of my dogs and Sean! Sadly he cant come with me to the first show as he is traveling to work somewhere too. This is really happening now. The biggest test our relationship has even been put to only time will tell if we make it trough.

But enough of begin all sad and sappy. Turning around in bed I see Sean is already awake staring at me, leaning forward I give him a soft kiss «mm morning Baby. You been up for long or?»

Pulling me closer to him he says «morning love. Not that long but I enjoy watching you sleep»

Giggling I lay my head on his chest «I'm going to miss you so much» my happiness soon turned sad as I said that. This isn't future talking anymore this is happening right now.

«Hey baby girl» with his finger he lifted my chin up to look at him «its going to be okay. Don't be sad its only temporary. And no need to be sad right now as you're still here in my arms. This is going to be amazing for you this tour just everything. Enjoy that!»

«Yeah you're right... as always»

***

We walk in hand in hand into my house. Many people are there its really crowded as everyone is getting ready to leave. Even Frankie made it here and is coming with us. Without really talking to anyone we make our way up to my room as I need to finish packing.

I start too look around for what I will need wile Sean lays down on my bed playing with Toulouse «calm down Ariana you're pacing. Its okay you've got time to finish packing calm down»

«Sean I don't have that much time. We are leaving soon. And I just... I just want to finish with this boring packing crap so I can spend a little more time with you.»

«Okay okay I will let you get to work» he seemed taken back by my level of intensity but right now my head is spinning with all kinds of craziness.

***

An hour or so later I finish zipping up my last suitcase and Sean help me take it downstairs to the rest. God I've packed a lot but eh thats normal when I'm going to be away for that long. And I also had to pack for my dogs too so thats an excuse too I guess.

Making our way outside we see everyone getting everything situated in the busses. The big trucks have already left they left this morning to make it there a little earlier than us. I have my own tour buss where me, mommy, Frankie, Alfredo and Jones is going to be. Scooter, Alison, Joe and other from my team is coming to the first show too but they're flying out tomorrow.

Sean walks me over to my buss and wraps me tightly in his arms sniffing in my hair taking in my scent «mm I'm going to miss you so damn much Baby girl»

Tears start to flow out from my eyes and I hyperventilate I've known this was coming for some time now but begin here in this moment its hard to deal with «I'm such a cry baby but Im gonna miss you beyond the moon n back» I sob out as I take in his scent. He doesn't have a strong cologne kind of sent, to me he smells like Sean and to be thats like home n safety.

«Hey baby girl. Its okay. Calm down you gonna hurt your vocal cords if you don't stop hyperventilating. Please calm down for me» some tears welled up in his eyes as well as he tried to stay strong for me. «Im going to see you soon. Sooner than you'll realize. Im going to see you in three weeks yeah? In Detroit. Its all going to be okay baby girl I promise you.»

My mom comes up to where I'm standing with Sean wrapped in each others embrace «lovebirds as much as I would love to give you two a little more time we haft to leave now.» She puts a reassuring hand on my shoulder as I pull away from Sean.

She gives Sean a short hug and say «bye Sean we'll see you soon. Ariana you have one minute sweetie until we need to leave.»

«Bye Joan, see you soon»

As my moms makes her way into my buss I pull Sean close to me pressing my lips onto his and let our tongues dance for a minute neither of us saying anything as it just would hurt too much. Pulling away I wipe my tears away «bye Sean. I love you beyond. Know that and never forget it»

I sit down opposite my mom and Frankie in the tour buss and try keeping myself together but after ten seconds I break down into a fit of sobs. Frankie quickly sit down besides me pulling me close «Ariana its fine you're okay you'll see him soon. Everything is fine, its fine, its fine»

«No Frankie its not fine. He is... I just.. I know ill see him soon but that doesn't make it any easier.. He is... he is the love of my life. Im sure of it. So no its not fine. It will be I just need a moment to let myself cry. I just need to cry. Okay?»

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