Silently I'm sitting against the chair, knees to my chest, heading resting on to the side as I stare at Santi through my teary eyes. The doctors said he would wake up soon but it's been days since he said that. We bought him home, to our home because I wanted him to be comfortable.
I've been letting him know what's been going on, how I've been tracking down my cousin, how I'm preparing to go kill him today. From the distance to where he was sleeping and where I was sitting, I could see his heart beating and that's what's making me hopeful that he's going to wake up soon.
My cousin hurt my husband, so I hurt him back. Family is who you love not by blood. I know where he's been hiding, away from my uncle and somewhere in a condo in the forests of Madrid. My eyes were glued to the bandage on Santi's body, wishing it was me instead, yearning for it to heal quickly as possible.
It's always the people I love the most who get hurt. First my parents and now Santi. I watched through my eyes my parents dying, hearing their last screams, yelling my brother and I's name. I didn't see Santi get shot but it feels like I've been shot. The bullet hit him, it was almost as if I felt it while I was waiting for him to return home.
Everyone who gets hurt that is my family is all my fault.
It's always my fault.
"Reina, querido." (dear)
I lift my head up to see Mr Valiente enter the room. Distressed, he approaches me with a tray of food. I wipe my tears away that were just welled up and sitting on my cheeks and sit up straight.
"I've heard you haven't been eating." His deep voice and authentic Spanish accent just remind me of how Santi speaks. I need him to wake up so I can hear his voice again.
"And I don't want to eat," I reply, looking back at Santi. I stand up from the chair to fix the blanket on Santi and move his hair out of the way. Wake up, baby.
"You need to eat, dear. I'm pretty sure if my son found out you haven't been eating, he'd tell all of us off for not feeding you." I find myself chuckling, shaking my head as I lean in to kiss his forehead. Of course, Santi would scold them for not feeding me. "Lilliana made your favourite." He adds on and from the aroma, I knew it was my favourite dish.
"How did she know?" I question, moving away from Santi to sit beside Mr Valiente.
"Well remember that time when Santi cooked for you. He spent hours on the phone with her, asking how to cook it."
"I can't eat while he's lying like that, unconscious and not knowing what's going on." I silently look down once I finished speaking. Playing with my rings, my eyes stay still on Santi because there's no other thing right now that I want to be looking at other than him.
"Reina, you need to eat to be strong." Mr Valiente hands me the plate of chicken and rice, I stare at it as my hunger grows but then my eyes just seem to be on Santi. Somehow I vision him pestering me to eat, him feeding me just so he could be satisfied that I ate.
And I have to be strong if I'm going to go kill my cousin.
"I'll eat Mr Valiente." Giving him a quick smile, I take some of the food onto the spoon and eat in front of him so he knows I am.
"I'll be back to check, quierdo. And call me-"
"Papa. I know," He flashes a familiar smile, making me feel at home and welcomed as always.
"Then use it, mi Hija. I don't want to hear no Mr Valiente anymore." He says, raising his eyebrows as if he was waiting for a response.
"Si, I will."

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𝑰𝒏𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓 | 18+ COMPLETED
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