Roses & Ruin

Chapter 36 (Lexi)

      My hair was still straightened from last nights sit down with the mob. I left it be and threw on some casual wear for the casting I have this afternoon. It's nothing too special. It's for a clothing ad, but it's work and it pays even if it doesn't pay as much as I wish it did.

    I texted Anthony this morning asking if we could talk. I felt like too much was left unsaid and if I'm going to be around more I think it's something we should acknowledge and put a proper end to. I just feel so strange about the whole damn thing.

Anyways, he agreed to it, so he's sneaking into the building my casting is hosted in and hopefully we can talk without Boris intervening.

He's waiting in the car just outside the building like he usually does when I'm at work, but with Vitaly here who knows how much tighter security will be now.

        I'm hoping this works in our favor. If not, and we do get caught, I'll have to make up a lie to get him and I both outta this. And I know what I'll say too. Chloe's at this same casting and if someone shows up I'll tell them it's her Anthony came here to see.

He can say he's hooking up with her. I'm sure his reputation could back up the claim.

        Most castings go the same way. There is a room or a hall full of girls and we all wait around for our name to be called, then we get sent into a room and there are strangers behind a table or standing beside some clothing racks or whatever else it is.

Those people tell you what they're looking for and sometimes change you into their clothes, etc to see how you'd fit the image. You walk for them, turn angles, pose for them, whatever.

Their judgy eyes stare at you until they're finished with you and then your dismissed."We'll give you a call back" they tell you, and that means you may or may not have gotten the gig. 

And that's what I did today and I was finished by 2pm as I predicted I would be.

        That's when I went into a vacant stairwell to wait for Anthony, between floors 3 and 4. I texted him that. He said he's sneaking in through the back. Should my life be this way? Full of secrets, lies, and sneaking around. No. It shouldn't. But it is.

For the past three years this has become my new norm. I guess it started somewhat earlier than that because I couldn't speak on my past and I was careful about social media and those things.

Mom told me it was best at the time. But my life was nothing like this when she was still around. There is no more living in the Now. I plan ahead for everything. I anticipate all outcomes. I think and over think.

        "Lexi" I heard the deep voice call my name from a flight of stairs below me. I leaned over the rail and waved him up a floor. As soon as our eyes caught one another's I felt suddenly unsure. I lied to him about a lot. I feel awkward addressing what must be addressed.

Anthony took a second just to look at me without saying a word. I finally sighed and spoke first.

"So this was quite unexpected" was my brilliant opening line to this discussion. I watched him swipe his hand down his jaw. No bruised knuckles this time, but now that I know who he is I'm even more curious what brought those on.

Mob fight? What does Anthony Rizzo do in his day to day life? I wonder.

        "You think? You lied to me Lexi. A lot" he called me out first thing. His voice wasn't harsh, but it still chaffed. I nodded in acknowledgment to that truth. "I mean, Christ, you're so young. You made it seem like..." he trailed off. Again I nodded in acknowledgement.

"It's not like I'm a minor" was my only defense and what a weak one it is. Anthony scoffed, rightfully so.

"No, but I'm 27 years old. I feel weird about it. I don't know, I thought you might be 22 or around there. Four or five years sounded less horrible in my mind at the time. But 7 years...Not to mention you being the daughter of the Bratva fucking mob boss. Do you know what'll happen to me if that truth comes out??"