SHATTERED

seventeen

saylor

i woke up to a loud thud, followed by alex loudly groaning "motherfucker, dude." i sat up on the couch, and i rubbed at my eyes.

i did not mean to fall asleep here.

i thought back to last night. alex had clearly drank way more than they could handle. honestly, if i wasn't here last night, i don't think they would've made it upstairs. they're lucky they even got here safely.

i thought back to when they had asked me why i helped them. they genuinely seemed confused about why i did. hell, it seemed like the entire concept of being helped was foreign to them.

i heard another thud from upstairs, which made my brows furrow.

what the fuck are they doing?

i looked around for my phone. i saw it on the floor by the couch, so i leaned down to pick it up. i sighed as i saw that i only had twenty percent of my battery left. i turned it off as i sat up and stretched.

a few minutes later, alex slowly trudged their way downstairs. i was relieved to see that they had put some clothes on before they had, since they had slept in only a pair of boxers.

when they got to the bottom of the stairs, they were rubbing their eye as they spotted me. their eyes widened.

"you stayed..." they mumbled as their brows furrowed together.

"i fell asleep on accident," i explained. "i was only gonna stay for a little bit."

their jaw clenched. "i didn't need your help, you know?"

"oh, cut the bullshit, alex," i sighed. "it's fine that you did."

"i didn't though," they cut their eyes at me. "i would've been fine without you."

"yeah, right. you could barely walk on your own," i scoffed.

"i can handle myself," they shook their head. they started to walk towards the refrigerator, but they walked slowly. they were careful with each step. they rubbed at their temple. "look, just fucking drop it. i'm not trying to do this shit right now."

i rolled my eyes. they reached the refrigerator, and they opened it and started to look through it. "yeah, whatever. a thank you goes a long way though."

they grabbed a red bull out of the refrigerator. they didn't say anything as they opened it and took a sip from it. after they did, they looked at me. they stared at me for a long moment.

their jaw clenched for a moment. they looked away, and they started to walk back towards the stairs. "thanks," they mumbled under their breath.

you know what... i'll take it, considering i wasn't expecting them to say it at all.

i watched them go up the stairs. i tilted my head, then sighed.

maybe they'll be even just a little nicer to me now. i'm not expecting a complete one-eighty or anything, but something would be nice.

i walked over to my guitar, and i plugged it into my amp. i turned the volume on low. i then walked over to the couch, and i took a seat. i started to practice some of our songs, since we have a show in just a few days.

roughly twenty minutes later, alex came back down the stairs. they were wearing different clothes, and their hair was still a bit wet. they were looking at their phone as they slowly made their way downstairs. they looked over at me, and they raised a brow.

"i need to practice too," they placed their phone in their back pocket as they walked over to their guitar.

"c'mon, then."

they got their guitar set up. they hesitated for a moment, then sat on the couch as well. despite this, they sat on the opposite side from me; they were as far away as they could be while still sitting on the couch.

we decided on a song to start with. even without jessie and miguel, it sounded good.

we played a few songs. we're now playing broken.

"there's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight," i sang, while alex harmonized with me. they held eye contact the entire time. "i wanna hold you high and steal your pain."

i couldn't help but to look away after that line. out of the corner of my eyes, i could see a small smirk tug on alex's lips.

"'cause i'm broken when i'm open, and i don't feel like i am strong enough. 'cause i'm broken when i'm lonesome, and i don't feel right when you're gone away," we both sang.

after we finished singing broken, alex let out a sigh, and they stood up. they walked over to put their guitar away again. when they started to walk back to the couch, they stumbled a bit. if they hadn't of grabbed onto the back of the couch for support, they would've fell down.

"are you okay?" my brows furrowed together deeply.

"i'm fine," they answered. they dipped their head as they took a few, deep breaths. "i just... need to eat."

"did you drink on an empty stomach last night?" i stood up and looked at them seriously as i left my guitar on the couch.

"yeah."

"are you— you're gonna get yourself killed drinking like that on an empty stomach," i threw my hands up.

"i don't need you to fucking lecture me," they gritted out. i glanced down at their hands, which were still gripping the couch. their knuckles were turning white. i also noticed how the skin on their right hand's knuckles was busted up.

"clearly, you need someone to," i muttered. i walked over to the bar, and i searched the cabinets. "there's no food here. i was about to go get some breakfast anyways; you stay here, and i'll be back shortly."

i walked back over to the couch. i was going to put my guitar away and grab my phone, but alex stopped me. they grabbed the front of my shirt as they narrowed their eyes down at me.

"i don't need your help, saylor. i don't know what you're trying to do, but you better stop now," they told me lowly.

"i'm not trying to do anything. i'm just being a decent person," my brows knitted together. "stop being stuck up and let me help you."

"i don't need your help!" their voice raised slightly. "how many times do i have to tell you that? i'm doing well enough on my own."

"yeah, sure."

we both glared at each other. neither of us said anything. we were both breathing a bit heavy, and i could feel their minty breath fan out across my face.

after a while, alex's harsh glare softened a bit. they let out a small exhale through their mouth. "i don't need your help," they repeated in a softer tone. "just... forget this shit even happened. alright?"

i stared at them, a bit confused, as my own face softened. my brows knitted upwards as they let go of my shirt. i swallowed, and i broke our eye contact. "yeah, whatever. buy your own damn food then," i moved past them to get to the front exit. i left without saying anything else.

•

a/n ayooo

thoughts?

any predictions?

words:
1220