Face it, Macy

Chapter Three

Blurred vision again. Blood again. Darkness again. Janie Anne the same. Why am I doing this again? It's pointless.

    "To find out what really happened, Macy." No. I know what happened that day. I'm sick of being told I'm wrong!

    "Macy, wait a sec." No! I don't believe you, you are wrong.

    "Why are you the one covered in Janie Anne's blood?" I, I was framed for it. Right?

    My hands. I could almost see my hands.

    "Are you holding something?" Why are you asking that?

    Why would I be holding something? I didn't plan on even seeing her that day. Wait, no I ran to her house. I remember sprinting over there, why was I there?

    I sat up, gasping again. The ceiling helped calm me, knowing I'm still in Jill's office. My hands gripped the leather sofa. I'm here.

    "Macy? Are you ok?" Jill had put down her notebook, she was at my side. She pressed her hand against my forehead, before handing me a tissue.

    "Why was I there?" I asked out loud. I don't expect her to know, but I don't think I ever asked myself that. What was I doing there? Janie Anne lived 4 blocks away from me.

    "I don't think we ever found that out. You never said anything before." Jill spoke quietly, like she knew I wanted it to be quieter.

        "I have no fucking clue." My voice got so quiet, I almost didn't hear myself. Sitting up, I wiped off my face. The cold sweat is the worst. I get a chill afterwards. 

    "How was the group yesterday? Hans said you actually stayed for the whole meeting." Jill smiled big at me. It felt fake, but Jill is always honest with me.

    "I hated it. Do I really have to keep going?" I sound like a child, but do I really need to go to anger management?

    "It's part of your treatment. I'm sorry but yes you have to keep going."

        "Fantastic." I rubbed my eyes, I could use a nap.

    "I got a call this morning from your parents." Jill mentioned. My head perked up. They've been visiting about once a month, so I wasn't expecting anything from them for a while.

    "Jack is visiting soon. He's been persistent in seeing you more." Jill smiled at me.

    "Really? That's actually nice." I smiled a little. Jack has always been on my side.

        "Oh, I'm also glad to see you playing games with everyone." Jill brought up. I shrugged at her,

    "I just enjoyed seeing everyone play."

    "Well, if it gets you out socially, then I support it." Jill smiled at me. She's good at being a warm and inviting person.

    "Well, you can head out after the daily reminder."

"Darkness is not my friend." I got up and left.

    Food times are always my favorite. They never let me eat in my room, so I sit next to Chelsea every time. She can be good to talk with, she reminds me of my best friend Kelly sometimes.

"There was also this one time I got caught in the band room at school." Chelsea rambled.

"Sounds interesting." Someone spoke up before sitting right next to me. Took me a second before realizing it was Aaron. Is he serious?

    "I know it sounds dirty but I'm talking about trading cards. They got banned at my old school so we would trade them in secret." She explained. I picked away at my food, I'd rather spend time eating then talking.

"Trading cards? My school banned normal things like porn mags." Aaron told us. Ugh, it's worse when the two people are talking with you in the middle.

"Macy, was your school cool at all?" Chelsea asked me. I shook my head, "We went to a private school."

"Awe! Did you have to wear a cute uniform?" Chelsea beamed. I really wanted to roll my eyes at her or something to show how much that question disgusted me.

    "Yeah we had the whole set up. It was a fancy private school." I quickly took a bite of food. Can't talk if I'm eating.

"I bet you looked pretty cute in them, with the skirt and all." Aaron whispered at me. This time I sighed, rubbing my face. If I get into a fight with him, Jill will know. She always knows.

Usually I don't care, but I got into enough trouble my first week here. I learned how maddening solitude is, and no way in hell am I going there again.

Instead I got up from the table and dumped my tray. Aaron weirds me out too much. Maybe Jill knows something about him.

"He's watching you." I actually turned around to make sure Aaron wasn't standing behind me. No, I can't listen to Darkness. Why would Aaron follow me around anyway?