Resisting Hearts

Chapter 36

Adira's POV:

'I want divorce' his voice rang in my head and my body stiffened. He felt it and quickly nibbled the weak spot behind my ear, earning a soft moan.

'since she is back, there's no reason to continue the contract anymore'

The vision of a figure standing inside the hospital room with a woman laying on bed with a small baby bump, came into my view and my body turned cold.

All the desire I had for this man died down then and there. Suddenly, my eyes welled up as tears rolled down like an unstoppable tsunami.

When he noticed my still state, he looked at me and stilled, shocked to see my tears.

I promised myself not to shed a single tear in front of this man but here I am, crying like a baby.

Aiden quickly put me down and I covered myself with my hands. He cupped my face, ever so gently, wiping my tears.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, baby, I'm so sorry, I am an a*****e. I'm really sorry, I won't do it again. Please forgive me, love!" He said softly, his voice shaking as he looked at my teary eyes, but instead of stopping, my tears came down with more intensity. He panicked and ran his hand through his hair in frustration.

"Baby, please! Your tears hurt me the most. Please don't cry, I will do anything but please don't cry. It kills me to see your tears." He pulled me in his arms as he whispered in a begging voice.

"Why are you doing this to me?" I asked in a small voice and looked at him. His eyes were misty as he looked at me with so much pain and hurt.

"I'm sorry, I love you!" Few tears fell from his eyes as he said in a shaking voice. I never saw him this vulnerable before.

Why now?! Why? Why is he confessing to me now when it's too late already!

Why is this all happening to me?!

Why can't I let go of this man who cheated on me and used me and threw me away like trash when he didn't need me anymore.

I did not want to hear him!

Why does my heart only beat for him?!

"Please, leave me alone!" I said quietly and looked away from his begging eyes.

"No, baby! I can't leave, knowing that you're crying. Please, I can't." He begged again.

"Please! I don't want to see you right now," I said, raw pain registered in his eyes as he backed away from me.

I did not look at him as he picked up his shirt and left the room. I slid down the wall and sat there, crying silently. I heard the main door closed after a little while. Knowing that he had left, fresh tears rolled down my eyes.

************

Aiden didn't come back after that. It's been a week but he didn't show himself to me at all. His assistant picked Atlas daily from my penthouse to his office and he would regularly talk to him on the phone but he never asked about me, nor did he contact me.

It's an absurd thing to say but I miss him a lot. I miss everything about him, his caresses, his voice, his touch, his kisses, his nearness, his laugh when he is having fun talk with Atlas, his gentle and warm gaze as he watched me putting Atlas to sleep, his hot gaze when he saw me working out and just- all of him.

"What about you, Adira? I asked for divorce, I admit, but what about you? You didn't even try to question me, you didn't even fight for us.. you didn't fight damnit.. for me." His words rang in my head.

Was I wrong?!

Was I wrong for not fighting for someone who didn't love me back?!

I chose my self-respect over staying with someone who didn't need me.

He said I did not fight for him, but did he leave me any other choice?

I chose to walk out gracefully with a child in my belly from his house rather than seeing him with someone else having children and living happily...

What the hell, Adira?!

How can you question your actions when he was the one who cheated?

No matter if our relationship was real or fake, he never cleared that out. He never mentioned Clara, he never confessed his love.

He wanted me to be faithful in our marriage, yet he cheated..

Because he loved Clara!

No one sees right or wrong, when it comes to love. Our marriage was fake and when Clara came back to his life, his feelings might have come back...

I felt a squeezing pain in my chest.

"Someone is in deep thoughts!" A deep voice brought me back to reality. I looked up and smiled.

"What brings you here?" He sat on the seat opposite to my office table.

"I haven't seen my fiancée for a week, of course, I had to come." He smiled but I couldn't return his smile fully.

"What were you thinking about?" He asked softly.

"Nothing! Just about work." I said, avoiding his eyes.

"Give me your hand."

I stretched my hand to him confused and he slid a beautiful diamond ring on my finger. I gasped and tried to pull my hand away but he held my hand firmly.

"I know this is sudden but I like you, Adira. I want to be with you for the rest of my life, have kids with you and grow old with you." He gazed into my eyes lovingly and I gaped at him.

When did this happen?!

"I- I-"

"I understand. You don't need to answer right now. I can wait. I just wanted to let this out because I thought I would regret it if I didn't, but you can give yourself a chance to fall in love with someone else," He spoke gently and stared at me for a while before reluctantly letting my hand go but not before giving it a gentle squeeze.

My heart refused to say yes but my mind wanted to give him a chance. I wanted to give myself a chance.

What about Aiden?

I may love him now but I might stop loving him if I give a chance to someone?

Moreover, I can't be with him when I won't be able to trust him with all my heart..

I can't forgive someone who cheated.. I just can't!

I closed my heart for years because I didn't want to step into a relationship, but I want to move on now, especially after what happened a week ago. I can't let him do this to me again..

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Love, Lucertia! 💕