Evermore

𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒖𝒓

-Diana's POV-

I lay facing the wall as I hear Natalie getting out of bed, opening and closing her bedside table. I stare at the dark wall letting my mind wander.

Natalie's lamp switches on and I don't move, I don't want her to know I'm awake. I've been crying most of the night but at least she still came to bed last night. We just slept facing away from one another, it feels so weird. I wanted to snuggle up to her and feel her kisses and hear her whispers like every other night.

She still said "I love you" though, I did too. I think that's a rule we have that isn't really spoken about...usually we don't go to bed mad but this is my fault.

Yesterday Cindy she convinced me to take most of Charlie's hoodies and some other bits, she told me that it was all too painful and she wasn't sure she could ever look at them again. She cried—we both did, sitting in his room knowing he'll never step inside there again.

But there was one thing that really upset me, there was a journal in his bedside table and Cindy asked me what was inside. It wasn't a diary necessarily because it had sketches of random things, probably from when he was bored—but there was also a page titled "Diana's wedding speech" he wrote his speech for my wedding. Cindy convinced me to take it after I began sobbing to the point I could barely breathe..I didn't read it, I couldn't because the tears wouldn't stop.

I pull the blanket over myself more as I curl into a ball, sniffling a little before the room goes silent, the shuffling of whatever Natalie's doing stops. I squeeze my wet eyes shut, still smelling the scent of Charlie's hoodie that I'm wearing. It's so comforting but also so painful.

I pull the blanket over my head and I hear the light switch from the closet, she has work, she's going to work...I have the house to myself all day, I have no distractions.

I just have myself.

I think I'll stay in bed for today, I'm not strong enough. Not today at least. I'm tired and I just need to cry and sleep.

I hear footsteps, getting closer to my side of the bed, I hold the top of the blanket before I hear something being set down on my bedside table.

She walks away, the footsteps going back over to the closet.

I push the blanket down a little, noticing a small piece of paper on my bedside table, I pick it up.

I'm late for work, didn't have time to make you coffee.
I love you.

I put the paper down, there's not a love heart like usual—or a little kiss mark from her lipstick or even a x.

I drop my head down against the pillow.

✺

-Natalie's POV-

"Miss, what are we doing?" Delaney, one of my students speak up. I sigh looking up from my laptop.

"How many times must I repeat myself before you all put your listening ears on?" I question, standing up causing the whispering to stop leaving the classroom silent.

I cross my arms looking around, watching them all turn away from their friends to face me instead.

"You are reading chapter thirteen, all of it and you are answering the questions in the booklet I have given you. If you do not finish the questions, they must be completed for homework. I will be checking tomorrow." I raise my voice and they all go their bags, I roll my eyes noticing one student looking beneath the table, Sophia.

Lord give me strength.

I walk around my desk and down to hers, the whispering starts again. Sophia quickly looks up at me straightening up.