Two shoes (Nathan Sykes Fan-Fic)

Chapter 21

Lexi's POV

I woke up and saw Nathan asleep next to me, he was sat on a chair close to the bed and his head rested on it. He gripped my hand tightly with his, I tried to wriggle out of his grip but failed. I took a moment just to watch him. He is so handsome... His eyes are gorgeous, his hair looks amazing even when it's a mess, he dresses well... He's just so perfect, what would he want with a messed up girl like me? He's obviously got some kind of plan and that scares me. I'm already a punching bag for one guy, I don't want to be one for two but I guess it isn't a choice for me, you do as they say or you pay the consequences. 

"Hey." He said gently as he woke up

"Hi." I said shakily

"Are you okay, you look uncomfortable." He said, his concern evident

"I-I'm fine N-Nathan." I'm not. I'm utterly and completely terrified of him, of what he could do to me. But I can't tell him that, complaining isn't tolerated with Alex, why should it be with Nathan? They're practically the same, they all are... 

"You can tell me the truth, you know." He said

"I-I am." I began shaking uncontrollably

 "I know you're not. You can trust me okay?" How? How can I ever trust you when all I've ever been taught to do is the opposite? I shook my head and he sighed, obviously disappointed in me. I should not have done that, I should not have done that... Alex would have hit me by now. I trained my eyes away from him, too frightened to look at him in case it provoked him.

"Okay... We'll sort this out later. But for now we need to figure out what to do."

"I called your Mum. I said I was a friend's dad, she believed it. If she asks, you're finishing off an art project with Natalie." He continued, flashing a cheeky grin at the sentence. 

"Thank you."

"I called your college too. They said as long as you post your work, it's fine. I asked your mum to do it, she will." He said

"Thank you. Nathan can you pass me my phone?" He leaned over and gave it to me, it was off so I turned it back on... One missed call... From Alex. I dropped the phone down on the bed, unable to hold it any more with my shaky hands. I broke down in tears, Nathan looked away for a moment then looked back and hugged me.

"Call him. I'm here, you'll be fine. I promise." He put emphasis on promise but I'd never believe him

"Hi Alex." I used all the power in my being not to stutter because I know how much it angers him

"Why the hell didn't you answer me bitch?" He spat with an evident drunken slur

"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry." 

"I'm staying away for another week, maybe I'll get drunk enough that you'll seem actually attractive." He laughed, mocking me

"I'm sorry."

"I guess I'll just have to make up the lost time... You will deserve it all as well." He cackled down the phone 

"What a bitch. Weak little pushover. And she cries constantly!" I heard him say, it sounded like it was from a distance before he hung up, I sobbed as soon as he did so.

"Nathan I'm scared, I'm so scared." He held me, the only thing keeping me from collapsing

"I know, I know. I can help you. I'll protect you and you'll never have to hurt again." I snapped like a twig, all the pressure on me mounted up and exploded

"Why?" The anger rising in my voice

"Why what?" He looked confused and hurt, I imagine every time he's said that before the girl just gave him a cuddle and thanked him

"Why do you care so much?" I nearly shouted

"I dunno I just do." He stuffed his hands into his pockets and looked towards the floor

"Well that's just not good enough Nathan! You can't just turn up in my life, tell me you care and mess up my whole life! All I know is that no one cares! No one! My Mum doesn't care or I wouldn't be working my butt off so I can pay the bills instead of her providing for me. She couldn't care less if I starved to death. Funny thing is, I actually am! My Dad didn't care or he wouldn't have walked out on us! Alex obviously doens't care or I wouldn't be a freaking punching bag! So don't just turn up and tell me you care! You don't know me, you don't know my life! I'll never trust you, I'm messed up so you may as well just get out because there's nothing here for you! Why are you still around Nathan, what do you want huh? Make your life look better? To make yourself feel good? Punching bag? Easy sex? Huh what?" I spat at his crushed looking face as a tear rolled down my cheek

 "Don't say that." He whispered

 "No please go on Nathan, enlighten me."

"Can't I just care?" He said quietly, his eyes were brimmed with tears but who knows why...

"Nope because no one does." 

"Why can't I?" His voice raised slightly and I could tell I was irritating him

"Because people don't!"

 "Has it never occurred to you that I actually like you?" 

"No why should it?"

"Hell! You're beautiful Lexi, I love you!" He shouted angrily

"W-what did you just say?" I was taken aback before I stuttered out

"N-nothing..." He looked down at the floor again

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" I yelled

"I love you Lexi." He looked up right into my eyes and I felt trapped under his hypnotic gaze

"Get out." I whispered. 

"But Le-" He started, his brow furrowing in confusion

"I SAID GET OUT!" I screamed at him. He can't... I'm not lovable... Even if I was Alex would kill the both of us and Nathan didn't deserve to be caught up in my life. I need to push him away but... I melt when he looks at me.

He got up slowly and walked out the room, I sobbed, my cries filled the silence in the room. I knew Nathan was watching through the window, I knew a tear escaped his eyes too, I knew a few more did... But I did nothing, I didn't ask him to come back. But he did. 

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have said that." He said, slumping down into a chair, his voice cracked slightly

"So... Is it true?"

"Yes." He propped his head up with his elbows which were resting on my bed. I reached forward and brushed his cheek with my finger, I gently placed my hand under the side of his jaw and pulled him forward. My heart raced at the thought of what I was going to do.

"Promise?" I whispered in his ear

"Yes." He whispered back. I leaned forwards and so did he, our lips grazed, the feeling of his soft lips against mine made my heart flutter. He seemed shocked to begin with but gladly kissed me back. I leaned back, smiling like a Cheshire cat, he grinned at me obviously as happy as me.

"Interrupting something are we?" Tom said in a weird voice, we both slowly turned our heads and saw the four boys smirking at Nathan who was blushing furiously

"No! I mean..."

"Shush Nath, it's okay." I assured him, drawing lines on his hand. He turned around and kissed my nose, my heart raced and fluttered, I kissed his adorable button nose too. We were in our own little bubble, both entranced by each other until... A round of applause broke out from the boys who then ran over to Nathan and have him proud hugs and gave me gentle ones too. Perfect