Pour que tu m'aimes encore...

PART 11...

As I thought, I hadn't gotten much sleep. I had tossed and turned but to no avail. My mind was working overtime and there was only one way I was going to get peace. Looking at my phone, it was ten a.m and making my way down the hotel corridor, I knocked on the door.

Carlos answered the door, obviously feeling rather worse for wear before allowing me to step inside.

"Carlos, Thankyou for listening to me last night but...".

"Amy, please don't say it. I know you like Seb and I won't stand in your way but please understand that I like you too and I will always be there for you whether as your friend or your lover", he said embracing me in a hug.

"Carlos, you showed me another side of you last night and it's one I like very much but I need to sort things out with Seb. I need to know", I replied before opening the door and placing a kiss to Carlos's cheek, I left.

Hesitantly walking the corridor again, I stood before the room. I don't know how long I was stood there with my hand raised. It could have been seconds or minutes. I was going through every scenario and it took all my willpower to knock.

I waited...and waited. I heard footsteps and the door opened, revealing a very tired Seb. It was obvious he hadn't slept either. He still looked sexier than humanly possible.

I opened my mouth to speak but was cut off by Seb encasing me in his arms. I allowed myself to be moved into his room and I heard the door shut like a bell ringing in my head.

Was I being lead into heaven or hell?. I went to speak. To chastise him for his actions the previous evening. To tell him that I hadn't slept. That I couldn't be hurt again, but...

"Amy, please let me speak", Seb started looking me deep in my eyes. " I am a fool. A complete and utter fool. The first test of our relationship and I failed. Please forgive me. Give me another chance, I beg of you. I Havnt slept thinking about how....".

I knew that my previous thoughts were now true. He was my downfall and my salvation. My addiction and my cure. I knew, in that moment, what I wanted and I need only ask. My heart was, once again over-ruling my head and I knew I had to give him that chance as he was, in reality, as hurt as I was. I guess I was more able to compartmentalise these things whereas Seb let his emotions rule. I went with my heart and uttered the words I needed to say. To feel.

"Make love to me Seb. We need to heal each other. To complete each other. To forgive each other", I whispered.

Love... It's a four letter word...two vowels, two consonants, one syllable.

Hate... it's a four letter word...two vowels, two consonants, one syllable...

Seb took a step back, staring into my blue eyes before speaking. "Amy, is this what you really want?".

"I don't ask twice", came my reply before Seb closed the gap and soon found his mouth upon mine, kissing me. Gently at first and then with the built up tension and passion from the other evening. Making the pain go away.

I found myself being led to the bed and very slowly, we undressed each other, finding myself shiver at his touch. Standing naked before each other, I started to blush, still finding myself nervous at his gaze.

"Amy, don't be nervous with me. You are beautiful and you are mine", he whispered, running his hands from my neck, and lower, over my stomach making me go wild. "Vous etes les plus belles femmes que j'ai jamais vu".

Both laying on the bed with Seb hovering over me, he started kissing from my mouth to my neck and lower to my collarbone. Moving lower still, he took one nipple into his mouth and then moved to the other, driving me wild. Looking me deep in my eyes, I was done for and when I took him in my hand, hot and ready, I felt him suck in a deep breath as he moved his hands lower to where I needed them most, making me cry out his name as he worked me to the brink of orgasm.

I was nearly out of my mind. I felt like my body was on fire from Seb's touch but could freeze from the flames.

"Seb, please. Your driving me crazy here", I cried out, his name a liturgy on my tongue. "I need you now", I said like I would a prayer.

Feeling him hard against me, I reached down and again, took him in my hands, wanting to drive him to a frenzy. To want me as I wanted him.

"Amy, I want to be inside you", he groaned and staring into my very soul, he entered me, causing me to cry out in pleasure. Every movement brought our bodies closer together. I felt like I was flying but falling at the same time. He was my life-line, my parachute and if I crash landed, I would die happy in this moment.

We moved in perfect harmony with each other. Like a symphony. Moving slowly at first, we soon found our rhythm increasing, holding onto each other. I could feel him so deep inside me, like our bodies had become one. Like we were unable to tell where one ended and the other began.

It felt like our souls were entwined as well as our bodies. I could feel that I was getting closer to the edge, as was Seb. I wanted to fall and I wanted him to fall with me.

As I reached my orgasm, I found myself calling out his name as Seb, too, found his release, holding me closer to him, both of us fighting to regain our breaths.

A minute, an hour, a day could have passed. I had lost all sense of time at this point as we laid there in that hotel bed, entwined in each other's arms with Seb gently stroking my back and myself playing with the hairs on his chest. My head rested on his shoulder.

Gently lifting my face to look into his eyes, he whispered, "be mine".

At that moment, I knew what to say and without hesitation answered him truly...

"Always"........

We stayed in that bed for most of that day, our bodies entwined. The outside world could go to hell. Ordering room service, we decided to spend that night there. It was Sunday and We had a break now with the tour until the next Friday. Time to ourselves.

I hadn't felt this relaxed in a long time. I had actually placed my mobile on silent. Something I hadn't done for a while and gave myself up to pleasure. I knew I couldn't turn it off altogether in case I was needed urgently but I needed for us to spend some time together.

We decided to go back to Seb's house for a few days and to meet up with the tour on the Friday morning in the next venue, which was Manchester. We needed the time together without the three amigos. Seb promised that he would talk to me when he had something on his mind and I promised to do the same.

I don't think that I would be able to face him at this time, after his confession to me. I knew that I still had work to do and would be on call for any of the guys. I had had comprehensive feedback from Simon for the first week and he was very pleased. Ratings were good and all venues had now sold out. I had made a decision to video one of the concerts, thinking either in the USA or Spain and turn it into a dvd, along with interviews and photos that we could do along the way, in various cities. Simon had loved it. A way to bring the tour to those who couldn't buy tickets. The guys were up for the idea too.

I knew that the others had had the same idea and were also in their houses in London. David was spending time with his wife, Urs with his girlfriend and Carlos, well, I hadn't really asked him. I just hoped that he was happy. I knew that I was on call during the few days off but secretly hoped they wouldn't need me.