Jumbled Heartaches* WWE Fanfic

Part 12

Nikki's point of view;

"Nikki, don't be mad at me anymore. Please. I'm sorry for being such a douche. I'm so sorry. I hope you can forgive me. I love you so much."

Brie rolls her eyes as I'm done reading the note that was attached to the big teddy bear. "Right." I say throwing the teddy bear to the floor.

"Are you going to forgive him?" Brie asks as I start packing up. "No. Never." I say remembering his words.

"He's a good guy overall. Don't you think you're overreacting?" She says, I stop packing and look at her. "Im not overreacting, Brianna. What he said really hurt me. You know how insecure I am about my breasts. He knew it too because I told him multiple times. Yet he still said it."

Brie gets up from her bed and sits on mine to face me. "You're right. I'm sorry. He shouldn't have said that." She watches me continue to pack up.

"Are you sure you want to leave today? Don't you want to come to Missouri?" I shake my head no. "But why? It's going to be great, Roman and Seth see defending their titles at Raw." She says trying to encourage me to do it.

"No thanks. I'm going back home, I've contacted a doctor already and he said he'd be able to do it in a few weeks. So I will rather go home and get settled." I tell her, "Are you sure you want to make your boobs bigger? I don't want you to regret it."

"Trust me I won't." I say smiling at the thought. Maybe when I get larger breasts I'd be happier with myself. "Does mom know yet?" She asks.

I stop smiling, "No. I'm going to tell her once I'm home. Hopefully she will be okay with it but even if she's not I'm still going to do it. It's my body and my money anyways."

"Okay. Well do you need help packing? Roman is waiting for me downstairs." She says, "No I'm good. Go ahead and go with him." I say, she smiles, "Okay I will see you later."

She walks out of the room and I continue packing. My phone buzzes and I check it. "Did you like the teddy bear? I hope you did, I know you love cute stuff like that."

I drop my phone and lay on my bed closing my eyes. I like Dolph. Like him a lot. I don't think what I feel for him is love but it's certainly a strong feeling. It hurts me being away from him but I can't forget what he told me.

What he said really hurt me. It might sound stupid and it might be stupid but that really hurt. It makes me feel like I'm not good enough. Like he doesn't like my body. It just constantly reminds me how ugly, fat, and imperfect I am.

There's a knock on the door and I get up. "Did you forget your key again, Brie?" I ask opening the door. Once I open it I see Seth standing there smiling. He's got chocolates on his hand, "Brie's not here." I say quickly trying to close the door, he stops me and hands me the chocolates. "I'm not here to see, Brie. I'm here to see you."

The chocolates look so good and so tasty it makes my mouth water. I wish I could take them and eat them all at once.

"I hate chocolate and I don't want to talk to you." I say trying to close the door again. He steps in before I close it. "Get out." I say annoyed. He puts the chocolates down on the counter.

"Nice teddy bear." He says looking at it laying on the floor. I don't say anything just stare at it.
"Can I please talk to you?" He says, "No. Get out." I say pointing to the door.

"Get out of I'll call security." I say in a threatening tone. "Why do you hate me, Nicole?" He asks.

I look at him not knowing what to say. "Because you're happy." I finally say. "What?" He asks. I suddenly realize how stupid that sounded. "Nothing just get out. I have to pack."

"No, can I please talk to you?" He whispers. I turn around and see him standing there with a pleading look. Maybe that's what makes me say yes. "Fine. Make it quick, Rollins. You have a minute. I'm not kidding."

"I want you to know that you can trust me. You can tell me whatever and I will give you advice if you need it." He says. "I don't need to say anything and I don't need your stupid advice."

"Brie is worried about you." He says, I roll my eyes, "Of course she sent you here." He quickly speaks, "Don't be mad at her. She's just worried and so am I."

"You don't need to worry about me. I'm fine." I say, "Are you though?" He asks looking me in the eyes. It feels like he can see right through me and that scares me to death. It feels like he can see all my insecurities and flaws. The thought of it terrifies me.

"Yes." I say trying to sound convincing. "Are you sure about..." His voice trails off and I groan angrily. "Oh my gosh! Yes! I'm sure about getting my boobs done. Why is everyone freaking out about it? I'm not the first or the last one to do it!"

"Sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you mad. I just don't understand why you want to do that. You don't need it." He says, I look away from him and sit on my bed facing the bed. "No one understands." I finally say.

"I will if you tell me." He says softly. "I just want to be perfect." I say staring sadly at the white wall. "You are perfect." He whispers.

I don't look at him but when he says this it makes my heart flutter. "You're perfect to me anyways, and to Brie and to everyone who cares about you."

"That's not good enough." I say tears falling from my eyes. "Nikki." He says kneeling down beside me. I don't look at him I just keep staring at the wall. "Leave Rollins. I don't want you here. Plus your minute is up." I say wiping my tears.

"Nikki please-" I cut him, "Leave!" He flinches a little and gets up. Seconds later I hear the door shut. I look at the chocolates he brought me.

Without thinking about it I grab them and start eating all of them. After I'm done there's melted chocolate on my hands. I go to the bathroom and see my nasty reflection.

I have to look away because the reflection is too much. I get on my knees and force myself to throw it up.

The guiltiness I feel for eating those chocolates are too much. I get up and take off my clothes to get in the shower.

The cold water hits me and my hot tears roll down my cheeks. I grab my razor that I use to shave my legs. I stare at it and remember everything that's happened.

The razor slips from my hand cutting two of my fingers. I wince as the razor falls and blood dots appear on both of my fingers. The blood runs down my hand.

As I stare at it, I cry even more.