Stiles; Holding You

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I HAD TO UPDATE BECAUSE OH MY GOODNESS GUYS EPISODE 9... IVE NEVER FELT SO EMOTIONAL AND UFH. MY HART.

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Stiles stood up from the sofa and grabbed his jacket that was thrown over a nearby chair.

"Hey man, where are you going?" Liam asked from where he sat. His arm was around Hayden's shoulder as they sat comfortably. Stiles missed being able to sit that way with Y/N.

"I have to make one last visit before heading home." He smiled softly. He put on his jacket and then headed for the front door. "See you guys soon." He left.

He climbed into his car and drove the familiar route. He had been driving here for the past eleven days. Eleven days.

His fingers gently drummed against the steering wheel and it was the only audible sound in the vehicle. There was no longer singing like there used to be. The silence slowly killed him. Slowly. He was suffering.

After less than twenty minutes of driving, he pulled up into a parking lot. He reached into the back of the car before taking out a single red rose.

He opened the door and climbed out, shutting it after and making his way through the cold. The wind was blowing with much force and the sky was completely dark, but none of that seemed to bother Stiles.

His feet carried him towards where she laid. He would do absolutely anything just to see her face again. He clung to his jacket tightly as the wind blew. In the process, the red rose that he held in his left hand got carried away, causing a frustrated sigh to fall from his lips.

He tried looking for it, but the darkness made it impossible. He continued walking towards her.

Her grave.

As he neared the stone, the sight of her name engraved into it made his heart shatter even more- if that was possible. His heart was broken and he didn't think there was anything that could ever mend it.

He tucked his hands into his pockets as he looked down.

"Hey beautiful." He forced a small smile. The image of her breathtaking smile filled his mind and his vision blurred with tears.

"I miss you." He simply said. "So much... It's been eleven days, I thought the pain would lessen, but it just becomes more and more unbearable... I really miss you."

He didn't even feel crazy for talking to her. Even though she couldn't respond to a word he said, he knew that she could hear him. Wherever she was.

"I, uh, I brought you a rose, a red one, because that's your favorite. That was your favorite. No, it is your favorite. You're still here, with me. It kind of blew away though." He stifled a short, almost unnoticeable laugh.

Stiles looked up towards the sky. There were millions of stars. It was uncountable. It was amazing. "Y/N, there have been nights where I cry so much that I can hardly breathe and I just can't believe that you're gone. That was actually every night for the past eleven days. I still can't believe you're gone."

He sighed. "And then there's tonight, where I just look up at all of these stars, and I tell myself that they're holding you. You're safe. You're safe from this crazy world. Yeah, the stars are holding you... I miss you so much."

The tears had trickled down Stiles' face as he spoke. He would never be able to feel her soft lips against his. He would never be able to hold her hand. He would never be able to marry her. Although they were only in high school, he knew that he wanted to marry Y/N. The entire pack knew that the two of them had an unbreakable connection. They were in love. They were made for loving one another. They were inseparable.

The only thing that could tear them apart was death. And unfortunately, it did. Nobody saw it coming. Scott tried his best to protect his friends, but Y/N's death was no one's fault.

Stiles' knees became weak, and before he knew it, they gave in underneath him and he fell to the ground. He sobbed loudly. It was a heartbreaking sound to hear and a heartbreaking sight to see.

His tears fell relentlessly. His heart hurt. His whole body hurt. He stayed this way for a long time and eventually it was time to get back up and head home.

His cheeks were stained with tears, but he didn't bother using his sleeves to wipe them away. "I love you Y/N. I love you so much. I always have and I always will."

He brushed his finger against the gravestone before walking back to his Jeep.

He got in and gripped the steering wheel. He couldn't handle the silence, so he turned the radio on.

There was a song playing; it was a song he had never heard before, but he didn't turn it off. He needed to listen to anything.

"Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up. I need your loving hands to come and pick me up. And every night I miss you, I can just look up and know the stars are holding you, holding you, holding you tonight."

Stiles' eyes flickered towards the radio for a second before the corners of his lips slowly twitched up into a small smile.

He leaned forward and looked up towards the night sky.

"I love you." He whispered.


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