Confusing Love

Chapter 36: The Feels

So for this weekend trip, chapters are probably gonna switch back and forth between our guys. Love you all! And heads up, drama's gonna unfold soon. Enjoy this small period of piece!

Shawn's P.O.V:
I open my eyes to the sound of birds chirping. I look over and see Aaron asleep. He's smiling. I need to stop looking at Aaron. I guess I can't be mad at myself because I think he's hot. I can't control how I feel. I just need to control it. As long as I don't act on my feelings I'm ok. I just can't control it. Look at his lips. They look just so kissable. Shawn stop! I think I'm just missing Cameron. Oh Cameron. I close my eyes and think about his face. His lips are so kissable too. And his abs, oh his abs. Fuck, I think I'm just really horny right now! I'm so used to be able to just let it out when I'm with Cameron, but now I have to keep it all hidden in. It's ok. It's already Saturday, I just have to make it to tomorrow night. I can do it. I feel a flashlight poking my leg. I reach down and grab. "Shit Shawn!" yells Aaron. He throws his blanket off and I see his dick sticking through his boxers.

"Aaron, I felt something poking at my leg. I thought it was a flashlight." I feel my face burning.

"It's all good, just a morning boner." he says laughing. I look away. "Well I think I should probably take care of it." he says.

"Oh well I'll just leave you alone." I stand up and go to walk out of the tent.

"No, no it's fine. It'll go away it's self." I saw him blushing.

"Don't be embarrassed Aaron. You can't control morning wood." He looks at me and smiles.

"You're right man."

"I wouldn't be embarrassed if I woke up with morning wood. I'd just sit here and wait it out." I'm laughing now.

"Ok. You having any withdraws from Cameron? It's been almost a whole 24 hours."

"Shut-up Aaron."

"Seriously though, I think it's sad that you can't even go a whole weekend without talking to him."

"I can! I haven't talked to him yet." Aaron looks at me, trying to taunt me.

"What if he's texting you right now Shawn. What if he thinks your ignoring him." Shit. What if Aaron was right.

"What if you're right man. What if he thinks I'm ignoring him." Now my mind is racing.

"Shut up man, I was just messing around." We both get up and change into some hiking clothes. I'm wearing a light grey shirt with black shorts.

"Where we hiking to Taylor?" asked Nash.

"Just follow me. I don't really know where we're going. I just know there's some trails that way." We start walking.

"Have you guys talked to Bart about our next tour yet?" asked Taylor. Bart is basically the man behind MAGCON. He's like the manager.

"I haven't talked to him in a while. One of us should call him when we get back." I said.

"Agreed. It feels like it's been forever since we toured." said Nash.

"I think a lot of fans would love to see us tour again, especially since Shawn and Cameron are dating." said Taylor.

"Shut up. Our fans don't care about us dating." I said.

"Are you kidding me? Do you not check Twitter or any social media ever? People are literally always asking questions about you two." said Aaron.

"I guess I've never really payed that much attention to that stuff." It makes me smile a little thinking that our fans care that much about our relationship.

"So what are all we doing today Taylor?" asked Nash.

"When were done hiking we're gonna go zip-lining. Then we'll probably eat lunch. Then there's a huge lake a few miles away. We could go swimming then come back."

"Cool."

*****

"Shit, I forgot to bring clothes to change into." says Aaron defeated.

"Well if you guys are down we could just skinny dip." suggests Nash. "If that's to weird for you Shawn." They all turn around and look at me.

"Guys no offense but I don't check any of you out. You're all like brothers to me. Cameron's the only one that gets things going for me down here." I motion to my package. I start stripping off my clothes. "Just to show you, I'll be the first to get naked." We all start taking off our clothes, throwing them into a pile. We're standing on a cliff about 20 feet above the water. "Ahhhh!" I yell, jumping off and into the water. It felt so good. The water wasn't warm, but it definitely wasn't freezing. I watch as the other guys jump in. I feel a small bit of guilt as a watch Aaron jump off, butt ass naked. I lied earlier. Aaron does kind of get me riled up. I can't control it. Aaron swims up next to me. We're away from the other two guys.

"I saw you checking me out when I jumped Shawn." I feel my face blushing.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I try lying.

"Shawn it's ok. You can't control that you're attracted to me. There's nothing wrong with it. I know you and Cameron are dating so I'm not worried about you acting on it either. And just to let you know I'm not gay. I mostly like girls, just sometimes a guy comes a long and turns me on. But like I said I know you and Cameron are a thing. I love Cameron and I love you to, but I respect him enough not to do anything with you too."

"Aaron, I'm not telling you to lie to Cameron just can we not talk about this, like ever."

"Definitely man, I understand totally." After we're done swimming we dry off, get dressed, and head backs to our camp. We sit around the camp fire, the breeze making tonight chillier than last night. Taylor pulled out a few things of beer.

"Here guys." He hands them around and we each get one. I don't like drinking usually.

"I'm good man."

"Come on, drink just a little bit." begged Aaron.

"Fine." I take the can.

"Here's to us." says Taylor, raising his hand holding the beer. "Right here in this moment we're living life. We're not always gonna have this in the future. I love you guys." We all start drinking. We sit around the camp fire, drinking more alcohol for the next few hours, having a little bit of small talk.

"Well I think I should.." I stop talking to laugh. Everything seems really fuzzy and I can't focus my eyes. "I think I should probably go to bed. Night guys." I start stumbling to the tent. I feel myself lose my balance and I almost fall when I feel someone's arms wrap around my shoulders, catching me. I look over and see Aaron laughing. "Thanks Aaron."

"No problem." he's laughing ridiculously too. We make our way to the tent. Aaron walks in first, and I follow behind him. Aaron turns around to face me. I feel my foot catch on the entrance to the tent. I fall forwards into Aaron. He grabs me with his arms and I land on top of him. We're both laughing. I look into his eyes and both of our laughs stop. Don't do it Shawn! I tell myself. I lean down, and Aaron moves his head up. Our lips meet and we hold the kiss for about 5 seconds. I pull away and we both start laughing again. I roll over, into my spot. This is all going to be a whirl in my memories tomorrow. The kiss was strange. The urge I was feeling earlier for Aaron is gone. The kiss was nothing like mine and Cameron's. When I kiss Cameron a burst of energy shoots through my stomach. I feel it in my veins. When I kissed Aaron the only thing I felt were his lips on mine. No love, no attraction, just two lips. Im happy now. I'm about to go to sleep. I get to see Cameron tomorrow. I can't wait to kiss him.