Chapter 50: Argue With Me

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JUSTIN'S POV:

"Baby?" I ask, peaking into my room to see a frustrated Ely sitting on my bed. She grabs one of my pillows, screaming into it. I back away, instinctually, startled by her screaming. I enter the room slowly, hands out in front of me. "Hey, hey, babe. It's okay," I soothe, siting by her. She glares at me after pulling the pillow from her face. "Look, I'm sorry."

She's quiet for a moment. "What are you sorry for?" She asks doubtfully. Oops. Hadn't thought that far.

"For... not agreeing with you?" I guess. She throws the pillow down on the bed as she gets up, trying to stomp away again. I grab her by the waist, pulling her down into my lap. "Not so fast," I say.

"Let me go, Justin," she mutters.

"Nuhuh. Tell me why you're mad," I request, pulling her in closer to me. She squirms helplessly.

"Stop it, Justin. I'm mad at you," she says, trying to escape my hold.

"I know that. What I don't know is why?" I ask, easily keeping her in my grasp. She sighs defeatedly.

"I'm mad because you always try to make my decisions for me. First with the eating, now with this whole Selena thing... I'm a big girl, Justin. I can make my own decisions," she asserts. I roll my eyes smilingly.

"Babe. I'm just trying to look out for you," I say.

"I don't care. I don't need you to! You don't see me tell you when to eat," she rationalizes.

"You've never seen me kneeling over the toilet with my fingers down my throat," I retort. At this, she elbows me in my stomach, knocking the wind out of me. She takes advantage of my moment of weakness, breaking free of my grasp. Shit. Okay, maybe I went too far. She slides her shoes on as she walks to the door.

"Fuck you," she says, slamming the door behind herself. I genuinely feel a pang of hurt in my heart. Fuck. Ely's never been mad at me like this before. I don't even know what to do with myself. My throat goes dry and my eyes sting with tears that I blink back. Part of me wants to go after her, while the other part is afraid I'll just make things worse. Again. Just before I throw my fist through a wall, Za opens my door.

"Hey, man. I saw Ely leave... Did you wanna talk?" He offers genuinely. Tears well in my eyes yet again, but I manage to keep them at bay.

"I fucked up so bad."

"What'd you say?" He asks knowingly.

"She's mad because I've been telling her what to do, like telling her to eat. She said she doesn't do that to me. I said something about her... problems."

"What the hell, man?"

"I know, I know, I fucked up," I say defensively.

"No, you royally fucked up. I almost don't wanna talk to you right now because of it," Za says, annoyed.

"I know. I don't know why I did it, but I need to make things right. Please, tell me what to do," I plead.

"Justin, I'm sorry, but I don't think there's anything you can do. I mean, you can give her space and time, but... there's no quick fix for this, bro."

"Shit," I whisper.

"I'm sorry, but you really deserve whatever you get for this... Why would you...?" Za scolds.

"I know! I don't know what I was thinking, it just slipped. I love El; I'd never want to hurt her. I just need to make it up to her," I say.

"Look, do what you need to do, but don't, I repeat, don't pressure her into forgiving you, especially not today. Give her space."

"Fine. I know you're right," I agree painfully. "I'm really gonna be sleeping on my own tonight, huh?"

"Next time think about that before you fix your mouth to say something like that to Ely again," Za says before leaving my room. I pull out my phone once he's gone. Typing sounds fill my eerily silent room as I compose a text message.

Me: Ely, I know you're mad -

I erase it, starting again.

Me: Babe, I know I fucked up -

Again, I delete it, starting over.

Me: Baby, I'm sorry. I know what I said was wrong, I know what I did was wrong, I know that I went too far. I know you're upset with me and rightfully so. But just know that I'm sorry. I understand if you can't forgive me, and if you need time or space or whatever. But just know that I am sorry. And I'm here to say it in person whenever you're ready to hear it. I miss you.

I hit send, my stomach dropping.

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