20 Ways To Kill Yourself ➳ Bullied By 5SOS

Chapter 34 - Blunt

"Michael how are you even allowed to take chemistry?" I questioned, banging my head against the wood of my headboard for the umpteenth time and wondering just how many more hits it would take to kill me.

"I don't know, just help me!" He begged helplessly, both his hands tugging at his newly dyed black hair.

"Look, I 'll explain it one more time and if you don't get it I swear I will toss your ass out of my window." I muttered, shaking my head and proceeding to skim through the material contained within the Chemistry textbook, not understanding how one was unable to comprehend the simple reactions.

Needless to say that after four hours, I had had enough.

"No, no I'm sorry! I swear I am paying attention please!" Michael pleaded as I tried to push him off my bed, my hands around his neck as I breathed heavily, prepared to squeeze the life out of him and turn him into nothing more than a lifeless corpse tHAT I WOULD THEN THROW OUTSIDE TO LEAVE FOR THE MAGGOTS TO FIND

"Shit!" Michael yelled as he fell face first, flat onto my floorboards, leaving a loud bang in his wake. "Maya, why would you do such a th-" He cut himself off before he continued as I waited. A few moments later, I rolled over to my side to see him laying on the floor, twiddling a certain white packet between his fingers.

My pack of cigarettes that I smoke each night out on the roof and later dissipate the flames on my skin, leaving nothing but a black scar.

"Uhh, that's umm nothing." I trailed off quietly, quickly grabbing the almost empty box and sliding it up my sleeves.

Without a word, Michael stood from where he lay and walked towards the door.

He bent down and fiddled with the contents of his school backpack as I inched closer, curiosity kicking in when I watched him pull out a very small plastic bag, the contents being too little for me to make out even with squinting eyes. Silence encased the room as he walked back towards me, sitting on my bed beside me where he previously was and showed me the bag. On closer inspection, it seemed to be containing an off green powder that resembled moss.

"Is that..."

"If you wanna get high, use the good shit." Michael cut me off as he handed the packet to me.

"How do you know what I want?" I challenged, squashing the marijuana blobs between my fingertips as they rolled over the plastic of the bag.

"Nobody smokes for the hell of it." He replied, casting his eyes off to the side. It felt as though he was talking from experience.

I shut my door and locked it tight before taking Michael's hand in mine and leading him to my open window. I sat on the rooftop, my legs crossed as I took apart two of the cigarettes that were slid up my sleeve. Putting a few smudges of the drug on the make-do tobacco paper, I rolled two blunts for Michael and I and clicked the lighter, watching the flames light the paper.

Michael left to use the bathroom all of a sudden while I began to drift into thought as he seemed to be taking quite a while...

Am I really about to do this? Taking the first hit meant no turning back...

After about 5 minutes of being in a dilemma with the angel and devil on my shoulders, I decided that thinking wasn't going to do anything so without another thought I lifted the lit blunt towards my mouth.

Ironically, only after puffing out the smoke, my brain decided to think again, but only this time the devil had won.

Number 12: Overdose on drugs and ride out the high to death.