At the Strand of Nightmares

Buy Windex Cleaner!

I didn't want to post much of anything because it seems no one can actually see it... but I finally cracked and was like, "Oh, fuck it. I want to write." Expect a couple of chapters later, maybe? You'll probably see them tomorrow or something.

So, I have gotten to that strange point when I'm so damn bored on here that I READ THROUGH THE CONTENT GUIDELINES.... FOR A SECOND TIME.

Yeah, yeah... don't judge. I was that one weird person that actually read the content guidelines when I first joined Wattpad.

What? I was worried using words like "damn" or "crap" would get me kicked off.... No really, look at my first few chapters of my first couple works.... They are squeaky clean.

And then I learned there wasn't anything wrong with using swear words and slowly but surely they've become a regular fixture on my page. Maybe I should go back to being a bit more clean😂

Anyways, as it turns out, advertising products is not allowed on Wattpad....

WHICH IS WHY I AM TELLING YOU ALL TO BUY WINDEX CLEANER!!

Yes! Made by the Johnson company, this wonderful, trusted cleaner will put the shine back in any surface!

. Glass!
. Wood flooring!
. Stove Tops!
. Bathtubs!
. Toilets!
. Tile!
. Uncle Jon's Meth Making Tools!
. And so much more!

And if you buy now, I'm giving away a special offer that if you buy in the next twenty five minutes, you'll get it for just $19.99!

BUT I'M NOT DONE.

I'm giving away a second bottle of Windex...FREE.

bUt YoU'vE gOt To AcT nOw!!!!!

BUY WINDEX YOU STUPID BITCH!!!

Or I'll hold your favorite aunt for ransom.

So, who wants some Windex???

(I really hope the Wattpad humans understand this is obviously an act of parody and I'm just being an idiot! Please don't report me😂)
_________
There's a bunch of quirky rules, anyhow XD Rules no one ACTUALLY FOLLOWS.

I'm dead serious.... I think I've found a violation for all of the rules and it is actually hilarious.

Anyways, I'm beyond frustrated with Wattpad not giving notifications....

So....

Until Wattpad can get its shit together....

I AM GOING TO BREAK ALL OF THEIR FUCKING RULES IN PROTEST.

Wait...

By all the rules I mean just writing ads for random products.... I don't feel like breaking any of their other rules😂

I mean, there's the no porn rule, the no advocation of self harm, suicide, or eating disorders rule, and the no positive depiction of illegal sexual acts such as necrophilia or zoophilia.

Dammit... I can only imagine how many perverts were pissed off by that last rule.

And who wants to write stuff that's positive about suicide or self harm?

I'll just stick to my ads, thank you very much😂 Those are at least tastefully funny.

What should I advertise next?

Until next time....