Desire ♡ Jungkook/Reader FF ♡ Completed ♡

I can't do this

Y/N's POV

I left the office with Jungkook, it was silent between the two of us as he escorted me to his car and opened the door for me.

"Thanks." I managed to force a smile, he gave a nod and waited for me to get comfortable before closing the door and moving around to the other side.

"Are you okay?" He asked once we left the parking lot.

I didn't look at him....I couldn't.

"I'm fine, where are you taking me?"

"I figured you needed some space away from Yoongi, how about lunch at the usual place?"

I shook my head, I didn't want to be around people and I certainly wasn't hungry.

"I'm not hungry, just take me home please. I'll message Jin and tell him I'm not feeling well, I can't go back there."

Jungkook sighed, I finally turned to face him and couldn't help but get lost in how handsome he was even when he was doing something as simple as driving.

"Why did you say it?" I finally asked him the question, I wanted to know what this was between the two of us.

"Why did I say what?" The grip Jungkook had on the wheel tightened, his knuckles turning a lighter shade from the pressure he was applying.

He was nervous, why?

"You know what I'm talking about Jungkook, why did you call me your girlfriend?"

I was surprised when he laughed, that definitely wasn't the reaction I was expecting.

"What's so funny?" I furrowed my brow, I wasn't really liking the fact he found this conversation so amusing.

"I heard you yelling at him, I came to make sure you were okay and then decided to help you out a little.....make him jealous."

I felt my heart sink, so he didn't actually mean what he said....of course he didn't.

"I can't do this anymore Jungkook." I swallowed the lump in my throat, enough tears had already been shed and I wasn't prepared to let that happen again.

I didn't dare look at him as the car stopped, instead my gaze remained fixed on the passing traffic.

"Can't do what anymore?" He suddenly broke the awkward silence.

"This friends with benefits, it's just not working out for me." I shifted nervously in my seat, still refusing to look at him.

"It's because of Yoongi....isn't it?" I noticed something in his voice as he questioned me, it was anger and maybe even disappointment.

Why? So what if this was because of Yoongi, why would he care?

"I thought this was good for me, that spending time with you made me more exciting and appealing. I was so convinced that Yoongi cheated on me because I was too boring, too much of a good girl and so this whole thing with you was me trying to make myself seem more exciting but the thing is Jungkook....I want to have a relationship with someone who is proud to be with me." I felt a lump forming in my throat but swallowed it, I refused to get upset about this.

"I like you Jungkook and if we continue with this arrangement then I'll only end up getting hurt all over again and I really don't want that." I felt a lone tear escape but quickly wiped it away with the back of my hand before he could see it.

"Y/N....I think you're beautiful and I genuinely care about you as a person but I'm not ready for a committed relationship. I'm still young, both of us are still young and with my dad ill and helping Jin run the company....I just don't have time to give. It wouldn't be fair to you, I wouldn't be a good boyfriend because right now I've got so much going on and......" He paused and sighed, I knew deep down Jungkook was a good guy.

"It's okay Jungkook, you don't have to say anything."

"Yes....yes I do so please just listen to me." I finally looked at him, he was staring right at me with a sad look in those beautiful dark eyes.

"Y/N....please don't think this is because you're not good enough or exciting enough because that simply isn't the case. I just....can't commit yet when there's so much going on in my life."

I gave a nod, cursing inwardly when a few tears fell over my cheeks.

"I'm sorry, I'm just such a mess right now." I spoke through small little sobs, trying my best to calm down.

"Hey....stop with these tears okay." Jungkook took my hand and kissed the back of it.

"I'll still be here as your friend, I promise." He added with a gentle smile.

Jungkook's POV

It killed me to see her cry, she deserved to be happy.

I felt my heart race as she placed her head on my shoulder, I wanted so badly to kiss her and make everything better but this wasn't the right time for that.

I knew a serious relationship wasn't something I was ready for just yet....but for some reason it still hurt me to reject her....why?

Did I simply feel sorry for her?

I forced a smile and placed a kiss on her head, for the next few minutes we sat in silence as she let out all the tears she had been holding back since leaving the office. I just held her....allowed her to do whatever she needed, that's the very least I could do for her.

I hadn't expected this, I hadn't expected for us to get this close.

There was a part of me that wanted her, wanted to give myself fully in return but right now my main priority was looking after the company and taking care of my father.

I guess there was another part of me, a small part which was afraid to truly give myself to her.

Why did the mere thought of that terrify me?

Y/N finally stopped crying, I waited for her to move away from my embrace before starting the car.

"I'll take you home, make you something to eat. It's the very least I can do as your friend....sound good?"

She didn't say anything, simply sniffled and gave a nod......damn she was adorable.

This friends with benefits arrangement shouldn't have happened, it only leads to one or both people get hurt.