Destiel One-shots

Pajamas

Dean, at this point in his life, as completely unsurprised when he walked into his room, only to find Cas sitting on his bed, staring at a pair of flannel pajamas pants in extreme confusion.

"Cas?" he asked, wondering what crazy thing the angel would be up to now. 

"Hello Dean," Cas's innocent, deep voice replied. He continued to stare at the pants.

"...What are you doing?"

"I'm trying to understand a concept you humans have, but it just doesn't make any sense to me." Dean sat down next to him, glancing at the pants.

"What concept is it? Maybe I can help you understand." Cas looked at him, his blue eyes twinkling curiously.

"Pajamas." He said seriously. Dean blinked.

"Pajamas." he repeated. "What about them?"

"Well, what are they? And why do you wear them? I don't understand why humans find it necessary to wear specific clothes when they are unconscious and sleeping. Wouldn't it be more efficient to sleep in your everyday clothes? And why are there so many kinds on pajamas? And why are some so revealing whereas other are not?"

"Uh...." Dean stared at the angel, not sure how to explain. "Pajamas are clothes that people wear to bed. We wear them because they are more comfortable then our everyday clothes, so they are better to sleep in."

"But don't people want to be comfortable during the day? Why don't people wear pajamas during the day, Dean?"

"Because they aren't official enough to be worn in public, Cas. And yes, it would be more efficient to wear your day clothes at night, but wearing a suit to bed would be very uncomfortable and then you wouldn't be able to fall asleep."

"So these clothes help you sleep?"

"I suppose." Cas tilted his head.

"Maybe I should try a pair to see if they help me sleep."

"No, Cas."

"Why not?"

"Remember when you drank Red Bull because you thought it would give you your wings back?"

"Yes."

"Well, this is kinda like that."

"But if pajamas are meant to be comfortable and help you sleep, then why do girl's pajamas look so tight and restraining?" Dean froze.

"Cas, where did you see these pajamas?"

"I saw them when I was at the mall with Sam. He got distracted, so I wandered into a store full of lace and girl's pajamas, and other things I couldn't identify." Dean stared at the angel.

"Cas....was the store pink?"

"Yes, the walls were pink with white polka dots and there were pictures of ladies posing in their pajamas on all the walls." Cas lowered his voice. "The ladies had very strange facial expressions, Dean. Perhaps the pajamas made them uncomfortable."

Dean fought to keep a straight face.

"Cas, those weren't girl's pajamas." He explained. Now the angel only looked more confused.

"Then what were they? There were no men in the store, so I assumed they had to be girl's pajamas. But I suppose they could be meant for men-"

"No no no!" Dean insisted. "The....clothes were meant for girls, just...they're not pajamas."

"Then what are they?"

"Cas, I think you were in a Victoria's Secret-" Cas cut him off with a loud Shush!

"Dean!" he hissed. "You can't go telling people about her secret!" Dean gave hi a deadpan expression.

"Cas, that store sells women's underwear and lingerie, not pajamas." Slowly, realization spread across Cas's face.

"Oh," he offered.

"Make sense now?"

"Yes, thank you." Cas paused. "Dean?"

"Yes Cas?"

"What's lingerie?"