Broken Pieces {E.D.}

32

After I ate dinner I made my way over to Ethans.

Dinner was awkward, consisting of my parents both commenting on how awful my cheek looked.

That and family dinner hadn't happened in so long.

Seems my pain brought it together for once. Awkward or not, together it was.

I knocked on their door and Grayson answered, smiling down at me. "Hey! How's your face?"

"Been better." I smiled and hugged him.

Grayson was seriously one of the bestest friends I could ask for. He was always so supportive and there for me.

He smiled and rubbed my back. "Ethan was pretty upset about your face." He pulled away from me.

"What happened?" I looked around the house, "Where is he now?"

"He left to go pick up the pizzas we ordered." He walked into the living room and sat down, me sitting down across from him in the chair. "I came home and he was kind of...I don't want to say panicking...but it was close to that. Like he was in the kitchen crying and I haven't seen Ethan cry in a long time." He took a deep breath, "So I asked what happened between you two, I thought maybe you guys broke up over the whole thing." He paused and looked up at me, but I nodded for him to continue. "He said he feels like the slap was his fault because he was trying to protect you and failed."

"He didn't fail." I felt my heart start to hurt for Ethan.

In no way was any of this his fault.

"I know and I told him that. I'm like 'E you know she knows you protected her' sorta thing, but he didn't believe me. He got so mad." He poked his finger toward the kitchen. "He got up so angerly from the table he tossed his glass onto the ground. Shattered everywhere."

I looked down at my hands, my heart breaking for Ethan. "Keep going." I whispered.

"Then he cried harder he broke it. He called himself a 'monster'. I think he still thinks, in the back of his mind, about how he punched Jack. Ethan was violent- slightly violent- during his darker days. When he breaks something or hurts someone now he gets so scared he'll flip back." He looked down, "The slap then the cup, it all triggered him."

"Was he safe enough to drive?" My voice laced with concern.

"Oh yeah. Yeah I calmed him down and then we ordered some pizzas and he said he wanted a drive anyway so he'd go."

I nodded and looked down, my hands rubbing against my legs. "I feel terrible."

"It's not your fault."

"I should've faught Cassidy."

"No. The hell you should have!" Grayson shook his head rapidly at me. "No. Neither of you can fight them. It'll just make it worse." He leaned onto his knees. "Autumn." I looked up at him, "You have created a safe place for Ethan. He needs you. If something worse were to happen to you.." He shook his head, "He'd go off the deep end again. He doesn't want that, he doesn't want you to see that. He wants to protect you to protect himself."

"I know."

"Besides, I think he still writes. Writing is his new form of fighting." I had a confused look on my face making him continue. "You didn't know he writes?"

I shook my head.

"He keeps a journal. Ever since he met you at that party, I'll go up to his room and see him writing in a blue and black notebook. He says it helps him relax and express his feelings."

My heart warmed at the thought of Ethan. Writing and coping through words.

Something I constantly do.