Tour: Stockholm, Sweden 3

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Time for the show. I finally got to the arena. I don't feel relaxed as I did earlier. I am worried I am going to mess up and stumble while on stage. So much in making me stay relaxed. Caitlin has stayed with me, well she is sitting on my lap. She leans into me as I have my arms around her middle. I am slowly relaxing now as I remember the massage she gave me this morning. I lean into her and my chin rests on her shoulder. Caitlin turns her head and gives me a peck on my cheek. Jon comes over. 

"You guys official yet".

" Yes since this morning" I had a beaming smile. 

"I am happy for you. You need to happy J. I know you have been through a lot. She is your guardian angel" said Jon.

"Nah she's my Knight in shining armour". I hold her tighter. My smile is huge with my dimples showing. Soon it was time to get ready for tonight. 

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Here goes now as we are in our circle to pray. I stand there with Caitlin next to me and I'm holding her hand. I still wearing a microphone headset instead of holding one. I feel anxious I am going to mess up. We are to go now, Caitlin follows Jenny to where they are going to watch. I walk with the others towards the stage and ready to go. I glance over to the two jokers and once again are looking like they are up to something. They look over at me and then turn away and snicker. 

Now it's time, we are standing on the ramp to go up. I stand behind Donnie again with my sunglasses. I have worn them all tour so far. I take a deep breath and look down. I feel Jon put his hand on my back to reassure me. Here goes as we appear on the stage. Don't look up, J keep looking at the floor. We go into One more night, My favourite girl, Dirty dancing and The right stuff. I can see Caitlin and Jenny at the side talking and cheering us. I smile at Caitlin. We go through the next few songs including going through the crowd to the second stage. I walked a little slower this time but not spending too much time as I am still shaking. I don't want the fans to know. Change of clothes and back out for the melodies of our old stuff. 

We do 'still sounds good' before I do 'Hard'. I am in my own little world while singing 'Hard'. I don't hear them coming towards me from behind. I dance to the song as I am singing but nothing like I did last year. I couldn't do it. I pull my jacket off but still got a t-shirt on underneath as Jon has on. The others have barely anything on. I still haven't realised what was going on behind me not until the screaming from the crowd got louder. Then I started to feel a little chilly. Strange I thought. The fans were cheering as my shirt was pulled up but I wasn't doing it. Before I knew it was past my abs and up near my chest, now my whole chest. The little pricks left it there and ran off back to Danny and Jon before I turned around. Once I finished I pulled my shirt down and put on my jacket back on and done up. I glared at the two jokers. They are so dead later.

We do some songs from '10' Remix and The whisper was done earlier so we did We own tonight (cos Jon has to sing), Survive you, Jealous (blue) plus we have one for a tester for me as we never done this one, Miss you more. Again I sat down for that song. Then Joe went into Please don't go girl, I sat out that one as my left leg was starting to hurt as I was getting tired. We don't sing Thankful as we use it for a break. I realised I have to sing I'll be loving you after step by step. Oh, crap the dance movements for Step by step as my leg is aching again. Hanging tough always finishes the show. 

Time to hurt the jokers. I didn't mess up this show but I am going to hurt them because of what they did. I grab a bottle of water as I need it before yelling them. I look around the room I don't see them. They must be hiding from me. I see Jon so I walk to him. He sees the look on my face.

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