Here I Stand (BWWM) (AMBW) [COMPLETED]

Chapter fourty seven: My personal hell

Isa's pov

One day I woke up, in a country whose population said my skin color didn't "match" the natives of such country, one day I woke up in a country way too little and slow for my ambition and curiosity, one day I woke and found out it wasn't a dream. It was my personal hell: Italy.

I used to dream being a bird to travel and see things, and people only to come back, to the same people every damn morning. What I'm talking about you're asking, the answer is way too long.

I'm talking about a country with a gloroius past, history, arts and even music, its population foolishly thought their empire would last forever, along with its power, and when it didn't; when it all came crumbling down, what was once an empire became what you could merely call a kingdom, formed by suddived little domains, basically forced being together.

What I found aggravating, was how the people seemed to be dwelling in such conditions: where the race of political parties was based on who could fool more people and steal their money, and how these citiziens didn't even fight back at such unjustice, all they needed were a few false promise and convincing speech.

I do consider Italy my country, calling a country home for me goes beyond the fact that you were born there or not; it depends on how your eyes sparkle as you speak a bout it, on how well the words roll off your toungue as you speak the language, on how you could cry for the overwhelming history, on how you feel warm and cozy no matter what.

When I left Italy, I didn't abandon it completely, I still carry certain aspects of its culture, traditions, educative system with me. I want my kids to inherit them, to know that I've lived there, and experienced things...

Several months after

I had just got back from work, I was playing with my chubby baby Ezra, when Adaline got back with Aaron from her swimming classes, "Mamma!" she screamed throwing her backpack in the air, Ezra got startled and started to cry so Aaron brought him in his room, so he could nap. "How's my beautiful baby?" I said embracing her petite figure, "Bene. Mi sei mancata tanto" (Good, I missed you a lot) she said snuggling closer to me, whenever she said things like that I'd start to cry: before you know those kids who were so clingy and affectionate when young, end up hating you when older.

"Ti ho preparato la merenda, è in cucina che ti aspetta". ( I made a snack for you it's in the kitchen waiting for you). She was heading for the kitchen when I reminded her to wash up. As she sat at the kitchen table to eat, Aaron came down with Ezra, "This kid has a great fighting spirit" he said looking defeated, "I guess he takes that from me" I admitted, cradling my little man in my arms, I took down my zipper and undid my bra to feed him, as I was doing so he kept dozing off but at the slightest movement wake up and give me the 'try me' look.

Aaron laughed at that view, "I wouldn't let go either" he commented shamelessly, for that I hit him with a pillow, the second time he grabbed my hand in mid- air, and looked at me seductively, "Should we have another baby?".

That question flustered me, Aaron kept his gaze on me "Come on, Ezra will be one in less than one week, you know my parents can't wait form me to have more kids, you also have always dreamed of a big family" he insisted on the topic, I still didn't feel comfortable with all the sex thing, let alone trying to have another baby.

"You know I've been working out and eating healthy, I'm sure you will get pregnant, on the first try" he whispered, making me shudder, I would've never thought that following a healthier life style in order to improve someone's sperm count could be something to brag about. "Good for you" I complimented patting his head, I stood up and went to put down Ezra, when I went downstairs Addy was done with her snack.

"Thank you momma, can we play now?"

I gladly followed her to the play room.

After dropping Addy off to school I went grocery shopping again, and there I met one of my old friend, we started to chat I told him I was married and started to brag about how kind, strong, cute and diligent Isa was. "... I'm actually scared that she might realize that she deserves better, and leave me". "I get you, that's why I have so many kids, that way she won't leave me".

At the time I thought that to be a genial idea, what a fool I was, anyway, since that encounter I couldn't help but to think about having more kids, Ezra was almost one year. So later that day I proposed the idea to Isa, who didn't seem too excited about it, I thought she just needed some time.

After two hours of playtime, Adaline and Isa sat to study some italian new words, Isa rarely talked about Italy, as if she still feared whatever used to haunt her there, I didn't want to push her although I was curious. I just know that her eyes sparkled every time Adaline spoke in italian.

"Come ti chiami?" (What's your name?) "Adaline, Quy Thompson", Addy replied readily, "When someone asks you that, especially if they're older than you, you should say the whole sentence: Mi chiamo o il mio nome è..." (My name is...) she calmly explained to our daughter. "Capito, il mio nome è Adeline Quy Thompson".

The time passed by quickly and before we knew it it was dinner time, I was way too exhausted to cook so I ordered something out, once the was food arrived Isa approached me with a long cucumber, "Eat it, it's a dutch cucumber, it'll help cleanse your stomach from the food you're going to eat" to say I was surprises is nothing but then I sat and noticed my daughter eating the thing comfortably.

After dinner I put the kids to bed, then jumped next to my lovely wife curled up in her hoodie, "Hey, you almost hit me" she complained about my childish ways, "I'm sorry" I apologised taking off her glasses so I could kiss her, "What are you doing? This isn't the time to get freaky, I'm tired do you want to cuddle instead?" Isa took her hands out of her pocket and grabbed mine and re-put her hand still holding mine inside her pocket, "Are you cold? Why are your hands always so cold?" she asked; I just melted to her whenever she did things like that, she always had a hard time to show affection to people so for me it was a big deal.

Ikissed her, holding her waist to place, I touched her breasts to which sheyelled, "Ouch, fuck! Aaron stop it" she exploded fed up, for whatreason though I was not aware.