[30] I'm sorry.

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COLBY'S POV

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p a g e s: 4

Aurora is still not back when I get a phone call from Ariana. My heart stop for a millisecond but then I answered. "Hey, long time no see" I tell her. "Hey, Cole" she sounded nervous. "How are you?" I asked. "I'm okay, what about you?" she asked. "Same, I'm so sorry Ariana for everything" I blurt. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about" Ariana says. "Of course," I say putting an arm behind my head. "Well, firstly why?" she asked me. I told her the story. I told her about Amanda, Amanda was just a game to me. She was nothing to me I mean sure I was depressed when I found out Amanda was cheating on me in my bed. Ariana was there for me when I was going through it. I knew she was the one for me. I fucked up hard. Hearing her cry is like seeing a puppy out in the rain.

After I was done. There was silence on the other end. "Ari?" I asked getting nervous. "I'm here" she sounded like she just blew her nose. "I know you probably hate me, I get that" I tell her. "I don't, hate you" Ariana tells me. "What?" I blink even though she doesn't see it. "Yeah, I mean I kinda do but I will never hate you, Cole" she uses her nickname for me. "That's a relief" I exhaled. Just then, Aurora came in giggling like a school girl. "What was that?" Ari asked. "Aurora's home" I say. "Oh, do you have to go?" she asked sounding sad. "No, no I'm okay" I say. Aurora walks in with a male I don't recognize. My eyes look at him as he looks at me then to my girl. "What the fuck" I say. "What?" Ariana asked. "Ari, I'll call you back" I say hanging up. "Babe, I didn't know you were home" Ro tells me unlatching her fingers from the dude. "Who the fuck is this?" I asked. "Um, I'm her boyfriend" the dude had the audacity to state. "Um, no I'm her boyfriend" I walked up to him fists clenched.

I didn't know what happen because I was on top of him punching him in the face. Ro tried to get me to stop but I couldn't. I haven't been into a fight in a while. I forgot how good it feels. "Colby stop it!" Aurora pulls me off of him. "Colby stop it!" Ro slaps me which makes me snap out of it. "I need to go" I say grabbing my phone, wallet and keys. "Colby! Let me explain" Ro calls after me. I don't say anything. I slam my door and drive somewhere other than there. I called Ariana. "Cole! Thank god! What happen?" she asked. "I know you don't to hear about my problems but you're the only one who I can trust still" I say still fuming. "Colio, you can talk to me 'bout anything still" she tells me. I vent to her like old times, it felt good to vent to someone who you could trust. When I was done, I felt better. "I'm so so so sorry Cole, I wish I was there... is that weird to say?" she asked. "No, I wish you were here too" I sigh. Ari sighs. I picture her on her bed cross legged reading something on her computer or journaling. "Aurora does these things a lot you know" she tells me. "What?" I asked.

She tells me the times Aurora played with guys thinking that they were her boyfriend. "Holy shit" I say stopping at the hotel. "Yeah, I know" she sighs. "I don't know what to do now" I tell her as I got to the front desk. "What feels right?" she asked me as I checked in. I thought about that for a moment. What does feel right? Should I tell her that this right here on the phone feels right. I bit my lip as I take my hotel room key. "Would it be wrong if I say this, right here?" I asked going to the elevator. I can tell she's smiling softly. "Colby, I can't not right now at least" she tells me. "Right, right sorry" I laugh airily. "It's okay, it's just still a lot to process" she tells me. "Hey, I get that" I say unlocking my door and walk in. "Yeah, how are you feeling with... everything?" she asked. "I feel awful about all of this shit" I sigh flopping on the overly fluffy mattress. "I know you do, what about the others?" Ariana asked me. "Just the same" I say.

We talked for a long time, until I forgot about Aurora and her 'boyfriend'. "Cole?" Ari asked. "Hm?" I asked. "Can we face time?" she asked nervously. "Of course," I say. We hang up and I called her on face time. She answered and she was in work clothes. "Hi" she says shyly. "Hey" I smiled she still looks beautiful. "What are you going to do about Aurora?" Ari asked me. "I don't know" I sighed. She nods. "Did you get out of work?" I asked. "Yeah, I did" she says proudly. "Where do you work?" I asked. "An art supplies store" she says taking her hair out of a braided bun. "When did you start?" I asked. "Few weeks ago," Ari smiled shaking her head. "Oh" I say. "Yep, I needed money to you know, survive" she joked. "Yeah, true" I laughed along.

We talked till 3 am. We fell asleep on face time I wish she was in my arms. I wish she was still mine. I wish I didn't fuck up and lose her. I wish I fell in love with her naturally. I wish I got to marry her. I wish I kept her with me. I just wish I wasn't such a dick. I opened my eyes and turned my head to look at my phone. She's sleeping peacefully. I wish she was next to me. I wish she was sleeping on my chest like she used to. I miss the way she traced my moon tattoo while we walk. I miss the way her eyes lit up when she looks at me. I miss how her lips move with mine. I just miss her. I turn over and eventually fall asleep to the thought of her against me.

X

It was nine am when I woke up. I rubbed my eyes and looked around. Then I remembered, I'm in a hotel room because of Aurora. "Good morning, sleepy head" Ari says. She's in the bathroom in just a towel. "Morning" I say rubbing my eyes. "I'm surprised I didn't wake you" she laughs taking off her hair towel. "How long have you been up?" I asked. "An hour" she says turning on the hair dryer. "Oh" I say shaking my hair. "Yep" she says brushing her hair. My phone vibrates.

Aurora: Hey, um I moved my stuff out of the apartment, I'm sorry.

I don't reply. I sighed instead. "What's wrong?" Ari asked. "Ro moved out" I say. "Wow, I'm sorry" she tells me. "It's okay, I knew it wouldn't last" I shrug. "Did you love her?" she asked me. I thought about it. I really thought about it. I compared the times I was with Ro and Ari. I realized I didn't love Aurora. "No" I simply said I think my answer startled her. "Really?" she asked. I nod. "Can I ask why?" Ari asked. "I didn't feel the same thing as I felt with you" I say without thinking. Ari dropped her hairbrush. "What?" she asked. "Yeah, I was in love with you, Ari I forgot about the game when I was with you" I say. "I don't know how to respond to that" she tells me. "Sorry" I say. "It's okay" she smiled softly turning around the camera. "Why'd you flip the camera?" I asked. "I'm changing" Ari laughs. "Nothing I haven't seen before" I say laughing. "Funny" I can tell she's rolling her eyes at me. "I can't help it" I laugh.

She got changed and flipped back around the camera. She was wearing a light pink push up bra. "Fuck" I bit my lip. "Nothing you haven't seen before" Ari mocked me. I laughed putting back my shirt from yesterday. "Do you think you would come back?" I asked. "I don't know, Cole" she says. "Too soon?" I asked. "Yeah" Ari laughs putting on a shirt which looked familiar. "Is that mine?" I asked with a smirk. Ari's face reddens. "I take that as a yes" I laughed. "Okay, it's yours" she tells me. "Thought so, you kept one?" I asked sensing hope that we could get back together. "I kept a few" she blushes.

Just then, I knew I was still so madly in love with her. I need her to be mine again.

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