Where I Was Before You

38. good morning love

My bed feels like a comfy prison. The guards are the pillows, the sheets are the bars, and the mattress is the stone wall. Only I was in no rush to break out of this prison anytime soon. For some reason, it was cold this morning, and I was cherishing being able to wrap myself in the covers. I must have only just started to wake up, because my ears were having trouble tuning into things around me, like the early morning birds chirping outside my window, which was so calming and blissful to wake up to. I felt the morning sun hit my face, but I didn't really mind. I just rolled over and faced the other wall in my room, snuggling into the covers even more. This is heaven. I've never felt comfier.

I feel something else shift in my bed, but for some very strange reason, I don't immediately open my eyes. It's probably CJ, and it was probably the trance of the comfy bed that stopped me from caring that much. I feel an arm reach over the top of me and hold my waist, and I can feel someone move in closer to me from behind, almost like we're spooning. I lift my head up and slowly look behind me. I'm not sure why I was approaching this situation so calmly, I had no idea who was in my f*cking bed, yet I was acting like I was just checking the time on my phone. I peered over my shoulder and could see a familiar mop of long black hair, lying peacefully right behind me, breathing softly, so calm, so relaxed. Yet inside I was screaming.

I started trying to get up and out of the bed, trying my hardest not to wake him. But as I got to my knees, I caught my foot on the blanket and fell forward, landing at the foot of my bed and causing the whole thing to shake. I cringe. God, I can't even be graceful the one time it really matters, can I?

"Good morning dearest." A velvety voice asks me. I want to hide and scream at the same time. Freddie, why are you in my bed? What happened last night.. why are you in my bed??? I slowly sit up and try to act like I didn't just trip over.

"Hi.." I look to Freddie sitting up in my bed, hair messy, chest bare.. wait. Oh god, please don't tell me we.. "You, aren't wearing a shirt.." Freddie just chuckles.

"Well, yes. I told you last night, I sleep naked." My heart sunk. H-he was just spooning me.. he was f*cking naked and we were spooning. My face went red, so red I could feel the heat of it.

"What happened last night?" I asked, a bubble of stress forming in my throat. Freddie smiled.

"Oh dear don't you remember?" He smirked. Oh god, it actually happened. We.. we slept together. No, no, no, no! This isn't what was supposed to happen. How could you do that Freddie? I thought we agreed.. I thought you understood. I felt so betrayed, so violated. I don't even remember it happening. that's the worst part, its something I wanted so bad, and I can't even remember it. I was that drunk.. Freddie, you f*cked a drunk girl, that's not f*cking ok! I tucked my legs into my chest and tried not to get distracted by his chest hair. I shake my head and he looks at me, very confused.

"D-did we.." But before I could even finish my sentence he finished it for me.

"Have sex?" He stared at me, intensely, and I felt my stomach knot. He let the silence drag on longer than I can stand.

"Did we?" I gulp, and I can tell he sees the fear laced in my face.

"Oh darling you would remember if we had." And before I could even process what he said, Freddie stood up and started walking across the room, not even attempting to cover himself. I buried my head into the bed covers so fast I got dizzy.

"Freddie! What the f*ck!" I hear the bastard laughing as he puts on his t-shirt and hopefully some boxers.

"Oh I'm sure you've seen worse you naughty creature." I hear him say from behind me. I feel like blood is pouring out of my face from how much I'm blushing.