Ex Pen Pals || michael clifford

1.4

14th February, 2012

Babe!

I'm so sorry it took like a month to write back but I'm so busy I don’t even have time to scratch my ass.

From your pictures and all your letters I really pictured you as some tough, punk rock rebel but your name is Gordon. What even? Michael Gordon Clifford. You sound like you should wear glasses and sell socks and used Spanish dictionaries on a freeway or something.

Gordon.

I will forever tease you about it. It may get you to America faster. I'm in need of that hug.

So, before I dive into all things drunkard Evans, I wanna say thanks for that letter. You happen to be a very deep person. Like, there is no way you’re punk rock Gordon. Your eyes are too green and your heart is too big. But I'm okay with that.

I did not see naked pictures of Luke and Ashton in the envelope. Your job is to make me happy. Picturing your pale skinny naked ass isn’t going to do that. I need to see Ashton or Luke.

As for my dad; I’ve chosen to ignore it. I tried talking to him and he said I’m the kid and I don’t need to be worrying about him and what he does. He insists he’s fine. So I’ve decided to have the ‘fuck it’ attitude again. I offer help and it isn’t wanted. I'm keeping my babysitting money now. All he does is buy booze with it. I may as well save it for a one way ticket to Australia so I could live in your basement. I know you said not to give up on him but I'm tired of trying and having him push me away. I can only take rejection so many times. But I promise you Gordon, I will try again. Sometime later, when I'm not this tired. That’s it for anything about my dad. Like, I'm serious. Unless I bring him up, please don’t let us talk about him. Yes, it’s that hard.

I need updates on your singing thing. Has it gotten you laid yet? These are the important questions to life. Just answer yes or no, I do not want details. Those are mental images I don’t need to have playing over and over in my head.

It was also weird that the other day I had a dream about you. Well, it wasn’t about you it was about me and one of your best friends (I choose not to say, it can even be the Asian). It was a very detailed dream Michael, like I’ve only seen this in movies (and no, it wasn’t just sex or anything, get your mind out of the gutter). Anyway! Yeah, so I was with him and stuff and before anything can actually happen (like sex) you came in and totally clam blammed me. It was frustrating because like, in the dream it happened like 3 times.

In a totally unrelated note; remember the two sets of nudes! It’s not like I'm asking you to post them on the internet or anything. You’re putting them in an envelope; caveman style. Is it just me or does that sound like a sexual position?

Oh! I win at everything because look at the date I wrote this.

Be my Valentine Michael Gordon Clifford.

Pease bitch. It always trumps Yolo,

 Abigail

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Kimmy aka fivesauceoption might say that last update was too short so here...

I lava all you lovely volcanoes. That made no sense.

Okay... bye. (get it?!?!)