54 PART 2

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double update, fuck yeah

here's the continuation of the last chapter 

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For the nth time that past hour, Yeonjun let out another sigh as he cupped both of his cheeks in front of the body length mirror.

He'd been staring at himself for a while now and couldn't help but notice that he had gained a few weights which triggered some of his insecurities to be out in the open.

Yeonjun couldn't understand those people who kept on complimenting him about his looks, saying that he's adorable, handsome, pretty and shit because now, staring at this mirror, all he could see was a person who looked like shit.

He became too tan for his liking after that one charity event and then his baby fats were showing more visibly on his cheeks and chin that he couldn't help but be disgusted about. And then, there came his hair, it looked boring as fuck and not soft enough and his eyes looked tired. The bags under them accentuating his point and fuck, his skin looked too dry for him. He felt so ugly and shameful and his mind was spinning and going on about how undesirable he might appear now.

His breath then got caught in his throat as that one particular thought entered his brain. He stared at his reflection in horror, mouth running dry.

What if—what if Soobin found me horrible and not want me anymore?

Yeonjun shivered at that, heart dropping to his stomach and he unconsciously bit his lip and pick on hi skin. His self-doubt and hatred slowly crawling from within and he was starting to get lost.

With shaky hands and wobbly feet, Yeonjun went inside his walk-in closet to find something to wear and dress himself up so he could prove that he could still at least try to be attractive.

He anxiously roamed the racks, desperately finding an outfit that would look pretty on him but a little voice at the back of his head was whispering that he couldn't look great anymore because he never was.

And that Soobin prefers someone who looks better than him and that the male wouldn't hesitate to replace him once he found someone prettier.

Yeonjun felt a prickling behind his eyes from the thought and forced himself to shake it off because Soobin is not that kind of person but he still couldn't help but consider the possibility because fuck it, why can't he be beautiful?

A couple of minutes later and Yeonjun had dressed himself up in a white turtle neck shirt and white pants with a black cardigan. He looked at himself again in the mirror and felt unsatisfied, thinking that someone could've worn it better and that he still remained horrible in his eyes.

Yeonjun blinked back the stupid tears away, not wanting to cry over this because he could still try to fix himself. He should still try.

He was about to walk back into the wardrobe when he felt arms wrapping around his waist from behind so he glanced back in the mirror only to see Soobin's reflection with his chin placed on his shoulder wearing a small smile.

"Hi." Soobin's mumbled softly and Yeonjun's world stopped because this man looked too fucking gorgeous with his dark hair and warm round doe eyes that always, always hold tiny little sparkles, his loving smile and soft cheeks.

He's just—so fucking magnificent and amazing and Yeonjun's dark mind was telling him he doesn't deserve a man like him.

He absentmindedly had a troubled expression which alarmed Soobin so he reached forward to peck Yeonjun on the cheeks, hoping to ease him down but the male dodged his attempt. Obviously, Soobin became confused and frowned, tightening his hold around Yeonjun before he could try to escape.

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